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What Are The Different Types of Divorce

Divorce settlement agreement document on a table with a pen, representing legal separation and marital dissolution procedures for individuals seeking resolution after marriage.
Every divorce is different, and so is the right approach to resolving it. Whether you seek privacy, speed, or emotional support, Florida law offers several methods that can suit your needs.

Divorce Methods in Florida

Process

Collaborative divorce is when a couple agrees to figure out the terms of their divorce outside of court with the assistance of a collaborative team.  Each spouse retains a collaboratively-trained attorney who helps them navigate through the process, advises them, and drafts the legal documents that formalize the divorce terms.  Often additional professionals are brought into the process:  a mental health professional who helps facilitate communication and develop a parenting plan, and a financial professional who gathers the family’s financial information and assists with option-building.


Participation agreement

Both spouses and every team member is required to sign a collaborative participation agreement in order to engage formally into the collaborative process.  This agreement outlines the various rules and expectations for the team and the process, including financial transparency, disqualification, litigation, and other issues.


When it’s a good fit

While collaborative divorce can work for all families, it is particularly helpful when children’s issues need to be navigated or when there are difficult conversations that need to be navigated.  Similarly, divorces from long-term marriages are aided by the collaborative process’s flexibility and sensitivity.  There is a misconception that a divorcing couple must be wonderful communicators in order to meaningfully engage in the collaborative process; to the contrary, collaborative divorce helps to shore up communication issues where couples would otherwise not be able to successfully negotiate the terms of their divorce.

Divorce doesn’t have to be combative.
Schedule a consultation to learn how collaboration can help.

Couple getting divorce in lawyer office, dissolution of marriage of two adult people

Florida mediation requirements

Many counties in Florida, including Central Florida, require the parties to attend mediation before they can proceed to a trial, and in many instances, before the court will permit a hearing on any issue, including temporary matters.  


Voluntary vs. court-ordered

In a divorce, the parties can always voluntarily engage the services of a mediator and attempt to resolve their issues through the mediation process.  This can be before the divorce has been formally started with the filing of a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage (pre-suit mediation) or it can be while the divorce is legally pending.  Usually, the court will not set a matter for hearing or trial, without the parties having attended mediation, in which case the court may order the parties to attend mediation directly.

Benefits

Mediation can provide the divorcing couple with the opportunity to resolve their divorce by negotiating the terms with the aid of a mediator, who does not provide legal advice or make decisions for anyone, but instead helps to foster negotiations.  Mediation lets couples make decisions about the terms of their divorce, instead of a judge, who has very limited information about each family’s history and circumstances and manages a voluminous caseload.  Mediation can also allow a couple to resolve their divorce much faster than if they waited for a trial before a judge.  

What can mediation do for you?
Find out why many choose mediation over court.

Contested vs. Uncontested by legal definition

An uncontested divorce is when both parties agree to all of the terms of their divorce before initiating the process legally.  This means they have agreed how all of their finances are going to be handled, including all marital assets and liabilities, as well as how they are going to co-parent any children they may have, which means deciding the time-sharing schedule along with many other issues that go along with co-parenting.

A contested divorce is the traditional method of resolving a divorce through litigation.  When the parties cannot agree on the terms of their divorce, informally or through an alternative dispute resolution process like collaborative divorce or mediation, then the only option left is a litigation, or contested, divorce.  It is “contested” not because the parties disagree about whether to divorce, but because the parties cannot agree as to all of the terms of the divorce.  It is important to note that if a couple has agreed on almost every term but a few lingering issues remain unresolved, that is a contested divorce.  


Requirements

For a couple to obtain an uncontested divorce, they will need to have some conversations between each other to get on the same page.  This is often referred to as a “kitchen table divorce,” because the idea is for a couple to sit down at the proverbial kitchen table and hash out the terms of the divorce, i.e., how to raise their children, who is taking what assets and who is responsible for what debts, typically before an attorney is engaged by either spouse.


Timeline

For an uncontested divorce, the majority of the timeline is typically taken up by the informal negotiations and conversations between the divorcing spouses.  It is usually not helpful to rush that process.  Once the couple reaches an agreement as to all of the terms of their divorce, it should not take much time for the attorney to memorialize all of these terms in the form of a Marital Settlement Agreement and Parenting Plan (if children as involved).  However, it is not uncommon for the parties to think they’ve resolved all of the issues, only for it to become clear during the drafting process that lingering issues remain, which requires additional time to follow up and seek clarification by the attorney.


Pros and cons

The biggest pro of an uncontested divorce is that it represents the cheapest divorce option.  The attorney time is typically very limited, so the legal fees can be kept low.  It also ensures that both divorcing spouses can determine what they believe is an equitable resolution to their divorce without being inflamed by litigation tactics and fear-mongering attorneys.  


One of the cons of an uncontested divorce is often couples simply do not have the tools or the emotional bandwidth to sit down together and determine how they are going to resolve their divorce.  Often, a couple can do that for many of the issues but cannot reach an agreement for everything.  And finally, a couple often will not understand what issues they need to resolve in order to get divorced.

Litigated Divorce

When it becomes necessary

A litigated divorce is sometimes unavoidable in Florida.  If one party refuses to engage in another method of divorce, such as a collaborative divorce, an uncontested divorce, or pre-suit mediation, then the only option left is a litigation divorce, in which they are compelled via a summons to engage with the divorce.  Additionally, when one spouse refuses to negotiate in good faith or when all other dispute resolution options have been exhausted, a litigated divorce remains the final option.  And finally, when there is interpersonal violence, child abuse or neglect, or addiction issues, litigation is often the only means to navigate a divorce safely.  

Couple With Judge In Court

How litigation works in Florida

A litigated divorce starts officially by one party filing a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage and having it served, along with a summons, upon their spouse via a process server.  The served spouse then has 20 days to file an Answer or other responsive pleading to the Petition.  At that point, the parties are engaged in a litigated divorce, with various court deadlines and procedures that kick in (such as mandatory financial disclosure).  If the parties cannot at some point during the litigation reach a resolution of the matter, the only other method to resolve the divorce is through a trial before a judge. 


Trial process

As one judge noted recently at a conference, “A trial is not a two-way conversation.”  At trial, both sides will present evidence regarding whatever unresolved issues remain.  The court will hear limited evidence and testimony and make a final decision after the trial.  At a divorce trial, the parties will not receive “justice,” but instead a determination of the remaining issues.  


Appeals and costs

The cost of litigation is typically extremely high, in particular if the matter goes all the way to a trial.  It is not uncommon for a litigation divorce that goes to trial to cost $20,000 or more per party.  In addition, every party is entitled to appeal the court’s final decision to an appellate court, which can itself represent another massive expense, to either prosecute or defend, and the matter could then be sent back to the trial court to resolve additional issues, which add more costs.  This is all to say that a litigation divorce can sometimes seem like a “runaway train,” and the costs will reflect that.

Side-by-Side Comparison

Divorce Method Overview (JUST an estimate and ballpark)
Cost Timeframe Privacy Emotional Impact Court Involvement
Collaborative Moderate to High 3-6 months, sometimes more. The most privacy.  The smallest number of documents are filed with the court. The best chance of reducing the emotional impact because the space is created to have emotional conversations during the process. Minimal.  Few documents are filed and the court signs a simple Final Judgment.
Mediation Low to Moderate  2-4 months, sometimes more. Typically, all of a couple’s divorce documents are filed in court. Often emotional issues are not brought into mediation, so the emotional impact can still feel daunting. Minimal.  While more documents are filed than in a collaborative divorce, the only court involvement is the signing of the Final Judgment.
Uncontested Low 1-3 months depending on how long the negotiations take Typically, all of a couple’s divorce documents are filed in court. Depending on the parties’ communication styles, this can sometimes lead to a less damaging emotional impact. Minimal.  While more documents are filed than in a collaborative divorce, the only court involvement is the signing of the Final Judgment.
Litigation High 6 months to 2+ years Everything is filed in court in a litigation divorce, and some parties use it as an opportunity to air their “dirty laundry” for the public to see. Typically the emotional impact for a litigated divorce will be the heaviest, due to the cost, lack of control, and feeling unheard. In a litigation divorce, court involvement can be very high, depending on how much the couple needs a judge to resolve.  If going to a trial, court involvement is immense.

Cost

While it is impossible to state how much any type of divorce will end up costing when all is said and done, the rule of thumb is that the more attorney and court involvement that is required, the more costly the process will be.


Timeframe

In a collaborative, mediation, or uncontested divorce, the divorcing spouses have the most control over the timeframe.  However, when a couple is relying on the court’s calendar and efficiency in hearing matters and issuing final judgments, the timeframe can get out of hand fast.


Privacy

With a couple very discrete exceptions, divorce records are public as a matter of law in Florida.  This means anything that is filed with the court as a part of a divorce is accessible to the public.  The collaborative divorce process provides the best guarantees of privacy because the settlement agreement is typically not filed with the court, unlike with the other methods of divorce.


Emotional impact

All divorces have an emotional impact.  Typically, the more control over the process and the better the communication between a divorcing couple, the better the emotional impact will be.  A collaborative divorce often uses the services of a family therapist to help navigate the divorce process, which can help with the emotional impact.


Court involvement

For any divorce to be official and final, regardless of the method chosen to get there, a judge must sign off on a Final Judgment of Dissolution of Marriage.  For a collaborative, mediation, and uncontested divorce, the court involvement is typically kept at that.  For a litigation divorce, whenever the parties cannot agree on an issue and negotiation fails, the judge is left to make decisions for the parties, which only increases court involvement.

Florida Law and Divorce Eligibility

No-fault divorce: What “irretrievably broken” means

Irretrievably broken is the legal requirement (aside from mental incapacity) for obtaining a divorce in Florida.  While the term is not defined in the Florida Statutes, it is understood to mean that deeply fundamental differences have arisen in a marriage that one or both spouses believe cannot be resolved.  Functionally, the term is not typically explored by the court in a divorce proceeding and it is taken as a given that the marriage is “irretrievably broken” if the proper language is included in a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage.


Residency requirements

In order to seek a divorce in Florida, one must have been a Florida resident for at least 6 months.  This is partly to avoid “forum shopping” where a party may seek a divorce in a state with more favorable laws for the position they are taking.


Legal process overview

In order to obtain a divorce, the parties must enter into a marital settlement agreement that resolves all of the issues of the marriage and have the court enter a Final Judgment, or the parties must ask the court to resolve their divorce through a trial and then enter a Final Judgment.

FAQs

What is the easiest divorce in Florida?

For simplicity’s sake, an uncontested or mediation divorce is typically the “easiest” in terms of cost and timeline.

How to prove marriage is irretrievably broken?

This is no longer something the court will typically scrutinize, and if it does, a simple statement as to the reason for seeking the divorce will suffice (ex.:  “I don’t love him anymore,”  “She cheated on me,” etc.).

Does it matter who files for divorce first in Florida?

The short answer is no.  However, if the matter ends up at a full-blown trial, the person who filed first will get to present their case first.  Otherwise, there is no functional benefit to filing first.  Any historical benefits are no longer the law.

When to Seek Legal Help

Unsure which path is right for you? Let’s find the right path forward together. Contact Artemis Family Law to get started.

Central Florida Collaborative Divorce Divorce With Respect Week 2025

My Conversation on the Respectful Divorce Podcast

I recently had the opportunity to appear as a guest on the Respectful Divorce Podcast with my friend and colleague, Wendy Aikin. We were invited to discuss how the Collaborative Divorce works and why it is often a better option than traditional litigation. We also addressed common questions people have about Collaborative Divorce and how it benefits families.

Solving Problems, Not Creating Conflict: The Collaborative Divorce Advantage

Collaborative Divorce often utilizes a team of professionals, including a financial neutral and a mental health neutral, who are trained to address common issues that arise in divorces. Unlike traditional litigation, the collaborative team approaches each family’s unique situation as a problem to solve together, rather than an opportunity to inflame emotions or prolong conflict.

How Trust and Teamwork Make Divorce Less Painful

One of the key strengths of Collaborative Divorce is the relationship between attorneys. Because collaborative attorneys frequently work together on multiple cases, they develop a professional relationship built on trust. While transparency and maintaining confidential communication between attorney and client are essential, when attorneys trust each other, they can explore creative solutions and resolve issues faster than the rigid, paint-by-numbers litigation process allows.

Co-Parenting Success After Divorce: Why Collaboration Matters

During the podcast, we also discussed how Collaborative Divorce benefits children and parents. Since this process prioritizes communication and co-parenting skills, parents are more likely to continue co-parenting successfully after the divorce is finalized. Learning how to navigate the Collaborative Divorce process together sets the foundation for a healthier co-parenting relationship moving forward.

Helping Families Through Divorce with Collaboration, Not Conflict

As a firm believer in Collaborative Divorce and a board member of Central Florida Collaborative Divorce, I am committed to making this process accessible to any family who may benefit from it.

If you are interested in discussing your divorce options, please click here to schedule a consultation.

When Is an Unequal Distribution Available in a Divorce?

Several sets of rock stacks - Unequal Distribution

The Factors

Equitable Distribution is premised on the starting point that equal is equitable.  (See prior post, “How Is Property Divided In A Florida Divorce?”)  In other words, Florida statutes specifically instruct the trial courts to begin analyzing equitable distribution with “with the premise that the distribution should be equal”; however, that same statute permits the courts to provide for an unequal distribution of assets and liabilities based upon certain enumerated factors:

  • The contribution to the marriage by each spouse, including contributions to the care and education of the children and services as homemaker;
  • The economic circumstances of the parties;
  • The duration of the marriage;
  • Any interruption of personal careers or educational opportunities of either party;
  • The contribution of one spouse to the personal career or educational opportunity of the other spouse;
  • The desirability of retaining any asset, including an interest in a business, corporation, or professional practice, intact and free from any claim or interference by the other party;
  • The contribution of each spouse to the acquisition, enhancement, and production of income or the improvement of, or the incurring of liabilities to, both the marital assets and the nonmarital assets of the parties;
  • The desirability of retaining the marital home as a residence for any dependent child of the marriage, or any other party, when it would be equitable to do so, it is in the best interest of the child or that party, and it is financially feasible for the parties to maintain the residence until the child is emancipated or until exclusive possession is otherwise terminated by a court of competent jurisdiction. In making this determination, the court shall first determine if it would be in the best interest of the dependent child to remain in the marital home; and, if not, whether other equities would be served by giving any other party exclusive use and possession of the marital home;
  • The intentional dissipation, waste, depletion, or destruction of marital assets after the filing of the petition or within 2 years prior to the filing of the petition;
  • Any other factors necessary to do equity and justice between the parties.

These factors seem to encompass practically any circumstance, especially when the final catch-all factor is thrown into the mix.  Fortunately, The Florida Bar Journal recently published a helpful article which discusses this subject in great detail, with an interesting report on the history of the law leading to where we are now, “Is An Unequal Equitable Distribution Equitable?”  While there are plenty of circumstances in which an unequal distribution may be appropriate, it remains the exclusion to the rule of equal distribution.  It must be emphasized that the circumstances leading to an unequal distribution are incredibly fact-specific and no one scenario is “guaranteed” to result in an unequal distribution.

Equitable Distribution and Spousal Support Are Different Pieces of the Divorce Pie

A pie with a slice out of it - Divorce Pie
Divorce Pie has multiple slices, including Equitable Distribution and Alimony (along with Child Support and Parenting Issues and more).

Many of the equitable distribution factors overlap with the factors that go into a determination of alimony.  Alimony is based on one spouse’s need and the other spouse’s ability to pay, after which various factors are analyzed to figure out what kind of alimony is appropriate, what amount, and for how long.  Unlike in the alimony context, the courts are instructed by the law to begin with the premise that equitable distribution of the marital assets and liabilities should be equal.  This means that if you are seeking an unequal distribution of assets or liabilities, you will have to overcome with mandated starting point and presumption against an unequal distribution.  While only certain kinds of alimony are available for marriages of a certain length, there is no presumption against alimony as a concept in the statutes; instead, it is a mathematical determination of needs and ability to pay.

Furthermore, if you are seeking alimony and an unequal distribution, understand that they exist within the same context, meaning if you are successful in your alimony claim, you are less likely to succeed in your request for unequal distribution, just as if you are successful in your request for an unequal distribution, you are less likely to receive alimony or there is a good chance you will be awarded less alimony.  It would be rare, but not unheard of, to receive alimony and an unequal distribution, particularly if they are both based on the same or similar factors.  But it cannot be emphasized enough that each case is unique, as are its circumstances.  A particularly compelling case for unequal distribution may also be similarly compelling in the alimony context.

Evidentiary Standard:  It’s Not Enough to Merely Make a Claim

When making a final decision regarding equitable distribution, Florida statutes instruct the court as follows: “any distribution of marital assets or marital liabilities shall be supported by factual findings in the judgment or order based on competent substantial evidence with reference to the factors enumerated [above].”  This means that the court must make written findings of fact in the final judgment and those findings of fact must be based on competent substantial evidence which relate directly to the equitable distribution factors listed above.  Thus, any equitable distribution decision, including one that is unequal, must be based on competent substantial evidence.  This means more than just a claim that something happened.  There must be actual, admissible evidence presented to the trial court to justify a decision.  Failure of the trial court to include these findings of fact in the final judgment is reversible error on its face.

Equitable distribution starts off on a pretty straightforward presumption that everything will be split equally when all is said and done.  While the process of identifying and valuing all marital assets and liabilities can be an arduous one, it is typically somewhat predictable, especially to seasoned family law attorneys.  However, the strength of a claim for unequal distribution is much more complicated than simply reading the relevant statutes and factors.  Only an attorney who understands the plethora of case law discussing various scenarios over the decades in Florida, like at Artemis Family Law Group, can accurately gauge whether a claim for unequal distribution should be attempted or if legal efforts and fees should be directed toward a different direction that has a better chance of success.  When you are ready to discuss your options, please schedule a consultation with our office today.

What is Mediation in a Florida Divorce?

people working together

In the realm of family law, where emotions often run high and tensions can escalate rapidly, finding amicable solutions to disputes is paramount.  One of the primary methods to resolve a family law dispute is mediation.

Understanding Mediation

Mediation is a voluntary but required process wherein disputing parties engage in facilitated discussions to reach a resolution.  How can something be both required and voluntary?  Well, in Florida parties in a divorce are generally required to attend mediation before they can go to court to have a judge decide things in a trial.  However, you cannot be compelled to settle or resolve a dispute through mediation, only attend mediation.  Thus, whether and how you will resolve a divorce at mediation (the terms to which you agree) is voluntary.

Additionally, mediation may not be required in cases involving domestic violence, child abuse, or other sensitive issues that may make mediation inappropriate.  In those instances, the judge will decide if mediation should still be required or if the parties may dispense with that requirement.

Unlike litigation, which can be adversarial and time-consuming, mediation fosters open communication and encourages compromise.  It provides a platform for parties to express their concerns, interests, and priorities in a non-confrontational environment.  Contrary to popular belief, the vast majority of divorces find resolution at or by mediation, obviating the need for a trial.

The Mediation Process

Engaging with Mediation

The mediation process typically commences with both parties agreeing to participate.  If both parties will not agree to participate, the court will often issue an order requiring them to participate.  In many counties, you are not typically permitted to bring a matter before the court (such as temporary relief) until the parties have attempted mediation.  This underscores the judiciary’s recognition of mediation’s potential to expedite case resolution and alleviate court congestion.

Duration

The duration of mediation sessions can vary significantly depending on various factors, including the complexity of the issues and the willingness of parties to negotiate.  While some disputes can be resolved within a single session lasting two to four hours, others may necessitate extended negotiations spanning multiple sessions over several days.  In recent times, virtual mediation has gained prominence, offering flexibility and accessibility to parties, especially amidst the challenges posed by the COVID-19 pandemic (although it should be noted that Rule 12.740(b) of the Florida Family Law Rules of Procedure makes it clear that unless the court orders the parties to conduct mediation virtually or the parties agree to conduct mediation virtually, mediation is required to be in person still–the standard practice, however, is for both sides to agree to virtual mediation at this point).

Cost

The parties will need to pay the mediator’s hourly rate and each client will be responsible for paying for their respective attorney’s hourly rate, as attorneys will appear at mediation with their clients.  The longer a mediation goes, the more expensive it gets overall.  However, mediations typically need time to warm up and make progress.

While mediation is not cheap, unlike court proceedings where fees are often unpredictable and substantial, mediation offers greater cost transparency.  Parties are responsible for paying the mediator’s fees, typically on an hourly basis.  These fees can vary depending on the mediator’s experience, credentials, and geographic location. However, compared to protracted litigation, mediation is generally more cost-effective and expeditious.

How Soon Can I Attend Mediation For My Divorce?

In order for mediation to be successful, the parties need to have all of the information necessary to feel comfortable weighing options and making decisions.   This means that the parties must have completed the financial disclosure process known as “mandatory disclosure.”  In a divorce, mandatory disclosure means both parties provide an extensive list of financial documents to each other through their attorneys and certify their compliance with the court.  This includes the filing of financial affidavits as well.

The Role of the Mediator

Central to the mediation process is the mediator, an impartial facilitator trained in conflict resolution techniques. While many mediators are attorneys, some may possess backgrounds in psychology or forensic accounting or other fields. The mediator’s primary role is to foster constructive dialogue, facilitate communication, and assist parties in generating viable solutions.  The mediator is not a judge or judicial officer and does not make decisions for either party or resolve disputes for them.  

The Advantages of Mediation

Confidentiality

Mediation offers a level of confidentiality that is often lacking in traditional court proceedings. Discussions held during mediation are confidential and cannot be disclosed in subsequent court proceedings.  This confidentiality fosters an environment where parties feel more comfortable expressing their concerns and exploring potential solutions without fear of public scrutiny or having it thrown back in their face in court.

Empowerment

Mediation empowers parties to take control of the resolution process and actively participate in shaping the outcome.  Unlike litigation, where decisions are imposed by a judge, mediation allows parties to collaborate and find solutions that meet their unique needs and priorities. This sense of empowerment can lead to more durable and satisfactory agreements.

Preservation of Relationships

Family disputes can strain relationships and create lasting rifts between parties. Mediation offers a less adversarial approach, focusing on finding common ground and preserving relationships whenever possible. By fostering open communication and mutual respect, mediation can help parties navigate difficult issues while maintaining a level of civility and cooperation.

Flexibility

Mediation is inherently flexible, allowing parties to tailor the process to their specific needs and preferences. Whether it’s scheduling sessions at convenient times, choosing a mediator with relevant expertise, or exploring creative solutions to complex issues, mediation offers a level of flexibility that is often lacking in traditional litigation.  Further, mediation is not a zero-sum game.  If you reach a point in mediation where you have resolved some issues but remain stuck on other issues, you may agree to sign a partial agreement that memorializes and binds you to the terms you could find agreement over and leave the remaining issues to be negotiated at a later time or decided by the judge.  Even this can greatly reduce the cost of litigation by focusing the parties’ and their attorneys’ efforts on just the specific issues that are left unresolved.

Conclusion

In conclusion, mediation stands as a cornerstone of family law dispute resolution, offering a constructive alternative to traditional litigation.  Its collaborative nature, flexibility, and cost-effectiveness make it an attractive option for parties seeking timely and amicable resolutions.  By embracing mediation, individuals can navigate the complexities of divorce and other family law matters with dignity, respect, and mutual understanding.  With its emphasis on communication, collaboration, and empowerment, mediation offers a path towards resolution that is both effective and sustainable.

When you are ready to discuss your options for resolving a family law dispute, including mediation, please schedule a consultation with our office today.

How Is Property Divided In A Florida Divorce?

a woman moving some boxes

This is one of the most important questions in a divorce.  While a marriage, and its undoing, can be fraught with complex and difficult emotions, the legal process of a divorce mostly comes down to who gets what and how to handle parenting issues.  The first question, who gets what, is decided through the process known as “equitable distribution.”

What Is Equitable Distribution?

Equitable Distribution is the process by which all of the marital assets and liabilities, also known as all of the marital stuff you’ve accumulated over the years and all of the marital debt that is left, is distributed to both spouses.  The concept comes from section 61.075 of the Florida Statutes, which outlines the entire process.  The first step in determining equitable distribution is determining what is a marital asset/liability and what is a nonmarital asset/liability.

Marital vs. Nonmarital Assets and Liabilities

The simple rule is that assets that were obtained before a marriage are nonmarital, meaning they belong to one of the spouses individually and independent of the marital bonds, and the same goes for debts that were incurred before a marriage.  For example, if you purchased an antique sports car before the marriage, that is presumed to be nonmarital and not part of the equitable distribution process.  Similarly, student loans that you took out before you got married are presumed to be nonmarital and will remain your sole responsibility after the divorce.

The same analysis applies when determining whether something is a marital asset.  If that antique sports car was purchased three months into your marriage, it is presumed to be a marital asset.  If you took out student loans three months into your marriage that is presumed to be marital debt.

That’s the quick and easy way to determine what are marital assets and liabilities and what are nonmarital assets and liabilities.  However, like many things in the law, it is never really that easy.

Common Issues in Equitable Distribution

Equitable Distribution can be complicated by a number of circumstances that families regularly encounter.  While these are exceptions to the rules, they are not uncommon.

Valuation

One of the trickiest issues in Equitable Distribution is determining the value of certain assets.  How much is your home worth?  Are you having the home appraised?  Do you and your spouse agree to the appraiser or will you each have your own appraisal performed?  Are you using an online listing option, such as Zillow, to get a feeling for what your house could be worth?  Or are you both simply agreeing to a value?  The answer to these questions will directly impact what number gets placed in the Equitable Distribution Spreadsheet (see below).  If you have a family business, it can be very tricky to determine the appropriate value of the business for Equitable Distribution purposes.

Pensions and Retirement Accounts

Another problematic area is with pensions and retirement accounts.  It is very common for a spouse to come into a marriage with an existing retirement account that was established pre-marriage, which they then continue to contribute to after the marriage has begun.  The pre-marital contributions, and interest derived therefrom, would be nonmarital, while any contributions and interest on those contributions after getting marriage would be considered a marital asset.  Calculating the nonmarital portion of the retirement account and any interest derived from those pre-marital contributions can be complicated and requires expertise to determine.

Pensions can be even more difficult to calculate because of the nature of how they pay out.  There is usually not a value that a pension can be traded in for until the time comes for one to retire.  Pensions will state a current payout amount based on projections, anticipated age of retirement, and other factors.  Even more complicated, if the pension was started before the marriage and continued throughout the marriage, it can be very difficult to find the precise nonmarital and marital values of the pension for Equitable Distribution purposes.

Active vs. Passive Appreciation

Another difficult area that can complicate Equitable Distribution is determining whether the increase in value of a nonmarital asset is due to active or passive appreciation.  Generally speaking, if a nonmarital asset appreciates in value during the marriage due to the active efforts of one or both spouses, that increase in value is considered “active” appreciation and is likely considered a marital asset subject to Equitable Distribution.  If, however, a nonmarital asset increased in value due to market forces, inflation, or other methods that neither spouse had any active involvement in, that increase in value is considered to stay nonmarital and not subject to Equitable Distribution.  This is common in real property and in investment accounts in which one or both spouses spent considerable efforts during the marriage to manage the investments.

Inheritances

Inheritances are a big exception to the ordinary marital vs. nonmarital rules.  Generally, if a spouse receives an inheritance or a gift that is not from the other spouse, that is considered nonmarital.  Also nonmarital are any assets exchanged for such nonmarital assets.  In other words, if you spend your inheritance while married on a yacht, that yacht is likely nonmarital even though it was purchased during the marriage.  However, if an inheritance or gift is comingled with marital assets, they can lose their nonmarital nature.  Thus it is very important if you receive an inheritance or non-spousal gift during the marriage and you would at least like the option to keep it nonmarital, to be careful how it is stored and what you do with it.

Equitable Distribution, Not Necessarily “Equal”

It is important to note that the term we use for the distribution of marital assets and liabilities is “Equitable” Distribution, not “Equal” Distribution.  While the courts are instructed to start the process “with the premise that the distribution should be equal,” the court is also permitted to perform an unequal distribution of assets based on certain enumerated factors, which we will discuss in another post.

Gathering Information

Typically, the longer a marriage, the more assets and liabilities a couple has accumulated.  It can be a very overwhelming process to gather all of this information into one place.  How does one organize all of this financial information?  A good place to start is an Equitable Distribution Spreadsheet.  The Ninth Circuit in Central Florida has a helpful Equitable Distribution Spreadsheet which one can use to input all information about a couple’s marital assets and liabilities.  If you are in litigation, your lawyer should prepare this form for you based on the information you and your spouse provide.  While one would think financial information is cut and dry and the answers clear, it is not uncommon for both attorneys to have differences in their Equitable Distribution Spreadsheets (usually regarding whether an asset or liability is marital or nonmarital or the value of an asset or liability).  If you are pursuing a collaborative divorce, the financial neutral will gather all of your financial information into their own Equitable Distribution Spreadsheet for the team to analyze and build options with together.  In the collaborative process, this spreadsheet is a joint document that both spouses and their team members work together to create and ensure it is accurate.

Equitable Distribution, along with parenting issues, makes up the vast majority of issues to figure out during a divorce.  It can be very helpful to talk to a lawyer about this process to figure out what, if any, issues might arise during the Equitable Distribution process and how to resolve them efficiently and fairly.  Please schedule a consultation with our office today to discuss these and any other questions you might have.  We look forward to hearing from you.

What is Dissipation of Marital Assets in a Florida Divorce?

a 100 dollar bill on fire

How Do you Prove Asset Dissipation?

Once a couple gets married, they have formed a partnership in which they are each impacted and bound by the decisions of the other spouse.  The income that both spouses make at their respective careers is considered a marital asset, part of the marital estate.  If they purchase a house, that too is considered a marital asset.  If one of them goes back to school, any student loans incurred during the marriage are considered a marital asset.  Any unwise financial decisions that one or both makes during the marriage is ordinarily considered part of the marital estate, for better or worse.  What happens when a marriage is reaching its endpoint, though?  When things are starting to come undone, but no one has initiated a divorce yet and decisions are no longer as mutual as they used to be?  In particular, what happens when one spouse starts spending money secretly, starts giving away money in anticipation of a divorce, or starts to spend significant amounts of money on a lover in an adulterous affair?  This is when we need to start discussing the concept of “dissipation of marital assets.”

What is Dissipation of Assets in Florida Divorce?

Under Florida law, equitable distribution of a couple’s marital assets and liabilities begins with the presumption that the entire marital estate will be split equally, or 50/50.  See Fla. Stat. § 61.075(1) (“[T]he court must begin with the premise that the distribution should be equal.”)  This fundamental concept of marital law is known as equitable distribution.  Notice that the term is not “equal” distribution, but equitable.  Another word for equitable is “fair.”  Essentially, the law starts with the premise that what is fair is an equal division of the value of the entire marital estate.  However, that premise can be overcome and an unequal distribution of the marital estate can be obtained under certain circumstances.  One such circumstance is the dissipation of marital assets.

Dissipation of Marital Assets

Section 61.075(1)(i) of the Florida Statutes defines marital dissipation of assets as, “The intentional dissipation, waste, depletion, or destruction of marital assets after the filing of the petition [for dissolution of marriage] or within 2 years prior to the filing of the petition.”

Case law in Florida has helped to explain this brief definition.  First, in order for an asset to be considered marital dissipation, it must be the result of intentional misconduct.  Importantly, mismanaging funds, being bad with money, or overspending do not count as marital dissipation.  In other words, you will not be able to go back and argue that all of the shoes or fishing trips your spouse “wasted” money on should be considered dissipation.  Similarly, it is not uncommon for one spouse to be the more prudent one when it comes to money and financial decisions while the other spouse might be more of a spendthrift or have a hazy understanding of the concept of savings.  Simply put, when you stay married to someone, you are choosing to go along with all of their strengths and all of their flaws, including poor money management.  You cannot go back later and claim you did not support this purchase or that purchase over the years.

Instead, there must be evidence of the offending spouse’s intentional dissipation or destruction of an asset.  And the trial court must include specific findings of such intentional misconduct in the Final Judgment, with a specific factual basis for such finding.  General allegations of misconduct will not be sufficient either.  One must prove that the asset was diminished or dissipated for one party’s “own benefit and for a purpose unrelated to the marriage at a time when the marriage is undergoing an irreconcilable breakdown.”  See Walker v. Walker, 85, So. 3d. 553, 555 (Fla. 1st DCA 2012).

What is an Example of Dissipation of Marital Assets?

So what constitutes intentional misconduct for dissipation purposes?  The most common behavior is when a spouse spends money on an adulterous affair.  However, there is a cost-benefit component that goes into this analysis.  If a spouse spends money on some dinners and dates as part of an affair, that is probably considered dissipation.  But the amount of time and attorney’s fees it would cost to prove it and obtain an unequal distribution of the marital estate as a result would almost certainly outweigh the amount actually dissipated.  If the affair was lengthy, involved substantial items like expensive jewelry, trips, or housing for a lover, that level of dissipation might be worth it from a cost-benefit perspective.  Of course, a cost-benefit perspective does not factor in the emotional harm that an affair can bring to a divorce and the non-offending spouse’s need to be made complete through a finding that some of the marital estate was dissipated in order to support the affair.  This is an individual decision that you should make after consulting with legal counsel to have a better understanding of what a fight over alleged dissipation would really entail.

Other common ways that dissipation can occur is when one spouse gives money away to a friend of family member in order to try to keep it from being considered part of the marital estate.  Gambling can also constitute dissipation of marital assets, depending on the circumstances.

Resolving Dissipation Issues Through the Collaborative Model

It is a common misconception that thornier issues, like dissipation of assets due to an affair, cannot be resolved through the collaborative family law process but must instead be obtained through contentious litigation.  To the contrary, we have resolved many complex and emotional matters, like dissipation of assets, through the collaborative process.  In fact, the results tend to be more efficient and also more conscious of the emotions involved, than litigation offers.  We encourage you to consider the collaborative model if your divorce will likely need to resolve a claim of dissipation of marital assets.  Please click here to schedule a consultation with us today so that we can help you better understand dissipation of marital assets.

Ways to Prepare for a Divorce That Aren’t Discussed (But Should Be)

people looking at graphs and charts

All major life events, both the good and the bad, are improved through preparation.  You prepare for a family vacation and you prepare for hurricane season every year.  Likewise, you should prepare for a divorce if you are considering one, and not just “wing it.”  There are many aspects that can go into preparing for a divorce.  This article will explore some of the aspects of preparing for a divorce that are discussed less than others but are as important, if not more so.

Establish a Support System Now

It is vitally important that you establish some kind of support system now if you are considering a divorce (or if your spouse has initiated one).  Divorces can be extremely isolating and emotionally devastating.  It is imperative that you have at least one safe space to vent throughout the process.  This can mean finding a therapist or divorce coach who can walk you through the transition of a divorce.  We have had many clients who have benefited from a local support group for people going through a divorce.  Some support groups are broken down into subgroups, such as men or women, senior citizens, religious affiliation, LGBTQ members, etc., so you should be able to find one that fits your needs.

Mentally Prepare for the Loss of Family and Friends

I know it sounds dire, but the reality is that when a couple divorces, it is very common for the couple’s friends to “choose sides” and maintain a friendship with only one of the spouses.  Similarly, it is common for the in-laws to side with the spouse that is their family by blood.  This does not mean you will be fighting with these people, but you should anticipate the possibility that a significant portion of your friend and family circle will disappear, sometimes immediately, upon the initiation of a divorce.  This can amplify the feelings of isolation and grief that come with a divorce, and this is why it is vital to take stock of your closest friends and family and identify who can serve as a confidant and trusted source of support.  Because this is not a “legal issue” in family law, it is rarely discussed by attorneys, but it is one of the most important things you can do for yourself going into a divorce.  Do not underestimate its importance.

Give Yourself a Financial Education

Few married couples handle the finances equally.  Whether on purpose or through the passage of time, it is common for one spouse to handle the financial logistics of married life, from paying bills and budgeting to making investment decisions and everything else financial.  What can end up happening is the other spouse finds themselves with very little financial knowledge.  If you are preparing for a divorce and you don’t have much financial literacy or knowledge, it imperative that you take the time to remedy this imbalance.  The good news is that in our current technology age, you have limitless resources to learn anything, including all about finances, investing, budgeting, retirement, etc.  While you should learn broad financial concepts, or at least become familiar with them, you should also take the time to learn about your family’s own personal finances.  What do you and your spouse actually make every year?  How much are you spending?  Are you investing any money and if so, how?  What do your respective retirement plans look like?  You will do yourself a great disservice going into a divorce with little to no knowledge of your financial situation.  You will ultimately be in charge of your finances when the divorce is finalized, so this is something you will have to learn regardless.  Doing it sooner will make your divorce go more smoothly and give you confidence going forward into your future.

Set Reasonable and Realistic Expectations

How will the divorce go?  Will it be peaceful and relatively quick or acrimonious and never-ending?  What will the new time-sharing schedule for your children look like?  Will you receive spousal support, and if so, how much?  What kind of new living arrangement do you actually need and can realistically afford?  Will this divorce change your retirement plans?  You should be asking yourself these and many other questions going into a divorce.  You should also seek sound legal counsel who will provide you with real answers, not just what you want to hear, so that you can start the process with reasonable expectations.  We have seen many parties led astray in their divorce because they did not set reasonable expectations with themselves and their attorney.

There are many things you can and should do to prepare for a divorce.  The best way to start this is to discuss everything with an attorney, even if you are nowhere near ready to move forward with the divorce.  The first time you speak to a family law attorney should not be when you have reached your breaking point and want to file immediately.  We are happy to talk to individuals who are simply exploring the possibility of divorce at some point in their future.  Please click here to schedule a consultation today.

What Happens If I Move Out During the Divorce?

woman packing her bags to leave

One concern we see often in divorces is how to handle the marital home while the divorce is pending.  For a related discussion of how to ultimately determine what to do with the marital home at the conclusion of the divorce, and the logistics of those decisions.

No Such Thing As “Abandoning” the Home

A very common misconception is that if one spouse moves out of the marital home, they will have “abandoned” any claim to it, whether it be the right to return to the home or the value of the equity in the home.  Neither concern is true but each warrants a discussion.

Moving out of the marital home during the divorce does not eliminate your right to return to the home or your claim to any possessions within the home that are marital property.  From a practical standpoint, however, returning to the home after moving out can be difficult.  If the spouse who did not leave the home decides to change the locks and security system codes (which is not unheard of), then the spouse who is attempting to return to the home, whether to move back in or to simply visit the home to check on or gather some belongings, will be thwarted.  This means that the attorneys of both spouses will have to work together to obtain the cooperation of both spouses to facilitate the returning spouse’s plans, a process that can be much more complicated and time consuming than you may imagine, due in part to the heightened emotional state of both spouses.  If the spouses cannot be convinced to cooperate in this manner, then a motion will have to be filed with the court to allow the spouse to return to the marital home.  Between the time it takes to draft and file the motion, coordinate hearing time, ensure the court is available, have the hearing, and obtain an order, months can go by.  As can be gleamed from the above, this can be a time-consuming and therefore costly process.  The conclusion here is:  Be cautious about moving out of the marital home if you think your spouse will lock you out as a result; you can get back in but it can be a complicated and costly process to do so.

When it comes to your legal claim to the value of the equity in the marital home, that is entirely unaffected by your decision to move out of the house during the divorce.  There is no legal concept of “abandonment” of the marital home in Florida law.  You will not lose your right to the value of the equity in the marital home, regardless of how the home is ultimately handled.  This is a pervasive myth in family law that has no basis in the law, perhaps based on antiquated statutes and common law concepts from ages ago.  It must be noted, however, that if you do move out of the marital home during the divorce, you and your spouse are still responsible for maintaining the cost of the home the way you had been doing so previously (maintaining the financial status quo).  In other words, just because you move out of the marital home during the divorce does not mean you are no longer responsible for helping to pay the mortgage, utilities, home owners’ association fees, etc.  This is why it is often financially not feasible for one spouse to move out during the divorce.  It is difficult to maintain two households on the income that was being used to support one household.  The conclusion here is:  You will not lose your claim to your portion of the equity in the marital home by moving out; however, it can be financially impossible to support two households while going through a divorce, so tread carefully.

Moving Out Could Impact Who Gets To Keep the House Ultimately

Something else to consider is that moving out of the marital home may impact who gets to keep the house ultimately.  If your goal is to move back into the house and keep it for yourself as part of equitable distribution, the fact that you already moved out and have not been living in the house for a substantial period of time may have a practical impact on whether you get to keep the house in the divorce.  Of course if both you and your spouse want to sell the house eventually, this should not matter.  Or if your spouse wants to keep the house and pay you your share of the equity in the home and you agree to that, this should not matter either.

Safety First, Always

If you feel that you need to leave the marital home due to domestic violence or fear for your personal safety, that should guide your decision to leave the home before any legal consideration mentioned above.  Your safety is the paramount concern.  Further, if thing have reached a point where you and your spouse cannot peacefully co-exist in the marital home, then moving out might be for the best.  A divorce can go on for well over a year and if you and your spouse are making each other extremely uncomfortable every day, it might be worth exploring your options to move elsewhere.

Making the decision to pursue a divorce is already one of the most difficult decisions a person can make.  Having to then decide how to navigate whether to move out during the divorce only compounds the difficulty and emotional strain.  We welcome the opportunity to help you make these decisions in a constructive and measured manner, so please click here to schedule a consultation.

Can You Make Your Spouse Pay Your Legal Fees?

a person tuning out their pockets to look for change

One of the most common questions clients ask in a divorce and other family law matters is whether they can make their spouse pay for their attorney’s fees.  Like most things in the law, the answer is unsurprisingly nuanced and complicated.  It is an important question because legal fees is one of the biggest concerns people looking into divorce can face.  Let’s face it—divorces can be expensive and not everyone has access to the same resources.  Florida law provides some options to try to level the playing field when it comes to attorney’s fees in a divorce.

Section 61.16

Section 61.16 of the Florida Statutes provides the primary basis for obtaining attorney’s fees from your spouse or the other party.  It broadly authorizes the court to “order a party to pay a reasonable amount for attorney’s fees, suit money, and the cost to the other party of maintaining or defending any proceeding under this chapter, including modification and enforcement proceedings and appeals.”  As the language indicates, these fees are available not just for an original divorce action but also for enforcement actions, modification actions, and appeals of the divorce.  The statute vaguely instructs the court to “consider[] the financial resources of both parties” in making this decision.  In the seminal decision Canakaris v. Canakaris, 382 So. 2d 1197, 1205 (Fla. 1980), the Florida Supreme Court held that the purpose of section 61.16 is to “ensure that both parties will have similar ability to secure competent legal counsel.”

Importantly, section 61.16 specifically notes that a party who is found to be a wrongdoer in the context of a domestic violence proceeding or enforcement actions is not entitled to receive attorney’s fees, regardless of the parties’ respective financial positioning (in other words, the person who is not paying child support and found to be a wrongdoer cannot receive attorney’s fees under this section even if they make significantly less income than the other person).

Section 61.16 is not intended to necessarily cover all of one party’s attorney’s fees for an entire divorce, or other family law matter.  Instead, a party can be provided with a limited amount of attorney’s fees at one point in the process and then the court can re-assess if more fees are necessary later on, depending on how the matter unfolds.

Section 742.045

Section 742.045 of the Florida Statutes mirrors the language of 61.16 and applies it to paternity actions.

Section 57.105

Florida law also provides attorney’s fees upon a finding that the losing party took a position that was not supported by the material facts necessary to establish the claim or defense or would not be supported by then-existing law to those material facts.  What this means is that if someone takes a position or makes a claim that is without factual or legal merit, then attorney’s fees are available.  It must be noted that this is a rather extreme provision that is rarely applicable in the family law context.  It is not enough to disagree with the other side or to interpret a case or statute differently (most litigated cases have at least some of this).

Before one can file a motion for attorney’s fees pursuant to this law, section 57.105, a copy of the motion to be filed must be served on the other side at least 21 days before the motion can actually be filed with the court.  The intention behind this is to provide the other side a period of time to rectify the claim that allegedly falls under section 57.105 (the outlandish claim that is without legal or factual merit).  This is referred to as the “safe-harbor” requirement.

Moakley v. Smallwood

Despite there being no statute authorizing it, the Florida Supreme Court has recognized the courts’ inherent authority to sanction attorneys for attorney misconduct.  An award of attorney’s fees under this provision is not based on a finding that the parties have disparate financial positions or need and ability to pay attorney’s fees.  A motion for attorney’s fees based on this inherent authority to sanction attorney misconduct requires notice, an evidentiary hearing, and detailed factual findings by the court.  Further, the award of attorney’s fees is limited to that which was incurred to respond to and deal with the specific misconduct, not just general attorney’s fees.

When to Request Attorney’s Fees

You can request attorney’s fees at various times in litigation, largely depending on the basis for the request in attorney’s fees.  Fees under 57.105 and Moakley v. Smallwood are a reaction to specific legal tactics and misconduct so they cannot be requested until that behavior has already occurred.  A request under 61.16 can be more proactive, toward the start of litigation if the financial resources are so imbalanced that one party can barely afford an initial retainer to get started, but the request can also be resolved after a full trial, when all of the ultimate evidence has been presented.

If you have questions about whether you may be entitled to attorney’s fees in your family law matter, please schedule a consultation with us today.

Navigating Divorce with P.E.A.C.E.: A Comprehensive Guide to Methodical Resolution

a couple talking to a councilor

Introduction:

Embarking on the journey of divorce necessitates a comprehensive understanding of the many issues involved.  Family law attorneys often use a structured approach encapsulated in the PEACE acronym, wherein each letter represents a critical aspect of a divorce in a specific order: Parenting Issues, Equitable Distribution, Alimony, Child Support, and Everything Else. In this thorough exploration, we will delve into each component of the PEACE acronym, explaining why addressing these issues in a specific order is not only mathematically sound but also immensely beneficial for organizing your thoughts during the overwhelming divorce process.

 

Parenting Issues:

At the epicenter of any divorce lies the pivotal matter of parenting, a facet that extends far beyond legal agreements. Addressing parenting issues early in the process is not merely advisable; it is integral. This phase involves determining time-sharing arrangements (formerly known as “custody”), constructing a comprehensive time-sharing schedule, and making decisions that profoundly impact the child’s education and healthcare. By dedicating time to resolve parenting matters first, a foundational structure is laid for other aspects of the divorce. Decisions made in this phase have a cascading effect, influencing child support calculations and impacting equitable distribution. Furthermore, an early focus on parenting fosters cooperative co-parenting, contributing significantly to a healthier environment for the children involved.  Finally, children should come first in any divorce, so deciding issues related to parenting first just makes good sense.  It also ensures that the time-sharing schedule, which should be based on what it in the best interests of the children, is not being impacted by financial decisions in Equitable Distribution or Alimony.

 

Equitable Distribution:

Equitable Distribution, the next step in the PEACE acronym, involves the fair division of marital assets and liabilities. This stage necessitates a meticulous examination of financial contributions to the marriage, essentially everything that a couple owes and owns.  Addressing equitable distribution after parenting issues enables a more accurate assessment of the financial needs of both parties, especially when considering the financial responsibilities associated with raising children. The process may involve appraising property, evaluating complicated financial documents, and negotiating a fair division of assets. This systematic approach ensures that financial considerations align with the responsibilities outlined in the parenting plan, fostering transparency and fairness.

 

Alimony:

Alimony, or spousal support, emerges as a critical aspect after addressing parenting and equitable distribution. This phase seeks to ensure a more accurate assessment of each party’s financial situation, acknowledging the complexities that arise after the dissolution of a marriage. The decisions made regarding alimony can significantly impact child support calculations, emphasizing the need to tackle this issue in a systematic order. Factors such as the duration of the marriage, the financial needs of each party, and the standard of living during the marriage are considered when analyzing alimony. This careful consideration plays a pivotal role in crafting a fair and sustainable financial arrangement for both spouses post-divorce.

 

Child Support:

Child support, a cornerstone in divorce proceedings, ensures that the financial needs of the children are met post-divorce. Addressing parenting, equitable distribution, and alimony before delving into child support calculations enhances accuracy and avoids potential complications. Child support calculations involve considering each parent’s income, the number of children, and specific expenses related to the children’s well-being, as well as the specific time-sharing schedule that the parents have agreed to use. A thoughtful approach to child support ensures that the financial responsibilities align with the parenting arrangements established earlier in the process. This systematic progression, guided by the PEACE acronym, not only streamlines the divorce process but also safeguards the best interests of the children involved.

 

Everything Else:

The final stage in the PEACE acronym encompasses addressing any remaining issues that were not covered in the preceding steps. This includes the division of personal property, considerations regarding adult children, and the finalization of the legal details of the divorce. By saving these miscellaneous issues for the final phase, individuals can focus on the core aspects of the divorce first, making the entire process feel more manageable. This deliberate approach allows for a comprehensive resolution, ensuring that no important details are overlooked in the rush to conclude the divorce process. Addressing everything else after resolving the core issues also provides a smoother transition into post-divorce life for both parties, fostering a sense of closure and allowing individuals to embark on their new chapter with clarity.

 

Conclusion:

In conclusion, the PEACE acronym stands as a guiding beacon, providing a structured and logical approach to navigating the complicated landscape of divorce. By systematically addressing Parenting Issues, Equitable Distribution, Alimony, Child Support, and Everything Else in a specific order, individuals not only follow a mathematically sound progression but also gain a profound sense of organization and control over the myriad decisions involved in divorce. This methodical approach reflects a commitment to guiding clients through the divorce process with empathy and efficiency, ultimately paving the way for a more peaceful and sustainable post-divorce life. As individuals traverse this challenging terrain, the PEACE acronym serves as a roadmap, facilitating a comprehensive and thoughtful resolution for all parties involved.  When you are ready to discuss the divorce process, please schedule a consultation today.

Answering Some of the Most Common Divorce Questions Part 2

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Today we are continuing our series in which we address some of the questions we hear most frequently about divorce.  If you have any questions of your own, please feel free to schedule a consultation today.

Does Florida law require separation before divorce?

Answer:  No.  While some states require a separation period before a divorce can proceed, Florida does not.  In fact, Florida does not recognize legal separation at all.  While you may live apart, you are legally married until you request and obtain a dissolution of marriage.

Can I avoid going to court for my divorce?

Answer:  Maybe.  If you have a litigated divorce with contentious issues that a judge has to resolve, you will have to go to court to make your case and arguments.  If you settle your litigated divorce through some kind of alternate dispute resolution method, such as mediation or collaborative, you can likely receive a final judgment without having to go to court.  Since Covid, many local courts have created processes to obtain a final judgment without having to appear in person, but the rules tend to change relatively frequently, and it is up to each individual judge’s policies and procedures whether an in-person appearance is required in a divorce.  If you file an uncontested divorce, the same rules apply—it is likely you can obtain a final judgment without having to go to court, but it is not guaranteed.  If avoiding going to court is a priority for you, it is important that you discuss this with an attorney who is versed in the various local rules and procedures to maximize your chances of keeping away from the courthouse.

Is the inheritance I received during my marriage considered a marital asset?

Answer:  No, but it can become a marital asset if you are not careful.  Section 61.075(6)(b)2., Florida Statutes defines as nonmarital “[a]ssets acquired separately by either party by noninterspousal gift, bequest, devise, or descent, and assets acquired in exchange for such assets.”  However, inherited property can become a marital asset if it is co-mingled with other marital assets.  The most common way to do this is to deposit part or all of the inheritance into a joint bank account.  Doing so likely changes the nature of the inheritance from a nonmarital asset to a marital asset—both spouses have access to it in a joint account and over time it becomes difficult to separate out inherited funds from a joint account.  The easiest way to prevent your inheritance from becoming marital, and thus subject to a claim from your spouse in a divorce, is to always maintain it in a separate bank account in your name only.

Question:  What other expenses will I have to pay for in my divorce besides attorney’s fees?

Answer:  There are multiple other types of expenses you may have to pay for in a divorce.  This is a list of the most common ones, but you should be aware that it is not an exhaustive list, and it is also not a list of expenses that every divorce necessitates.

  • Filing fee;
  • The cost to have the clerk of court execute a Summons;
  • Having a process server serve your Summons and Petition on your spouse;
  • Having a court reporter present at a hearing;
  • Having a court reporter create the transcripts from a hearing;
  • The cost of a private investigator;
  • Recording costs to have a Final Judgment or Deed recorded;
  • Certified Copies of your Final Judgment from the clerk’s office.

 

Divorces are full of nuances and complicated decisions.  This is why it is important that you speak to an attorney who will help you understand the law and your options, not someone who will simply quote a statute at you and expect you to fully understand something attorneys go to law school to be able to grasp.  At Artemis Family Law Group, we pride ourselves on making the law as accessible to clients as possible.  If you don’t understand something, then our job is not finished.  Please click here to schedule a consultation at your convenience.   And continue to read this ongoing series to answer some of your most common questions.

Answering Some of the Most Common Divorce Questions

Question marks made out of paper with different speech bubbles behind them

Today we are taking the opportunity to address some of the questions we hear most frequently about divorce.  As a divorce involves every area of your life, it is only natural for there to be all kinds of questions about it.  We anticipate this being an ongoing series as there are plenty of questions to answer.  If you don’t find the answer to your specific question here, please click here to schedule a consultation with us today so that we can help.

Are divorce papers public?

Answer:  Usually yes.  While this can vary from state to state, Florida has a broad public records policy.  A divorce is a legal action which goes through the court system, which means anything filed in a divorce is public record unless some portion of a document is redacted (because it contains sensitive information) or if the matter is sealed by the court at its conclusion.  One of the many benefits of a collaborative divorce is the minimal number of legal filings required to obtain a divorce—typically even the settlement agreement is excluded from the court record.  If privacy is your primary concern, consider a collaborative divorce.

How long will a divorce take?

Answer:  This depends on many different factors.  A litigated divorce typically takes the longest because the adversarial process adds many steps to a divorce.  In a litigated divorce, communications often go through both attorneys, which can substantially increase the time it takes to resolve any issue.  For example, if Client A is having trouble with an issue related to soccer camp, he brings it up to his attorney, who then contacts Client B’s attorney to address the issue.  Client B’s attorney then contacts Client B to discuss it directly, before then reaching back out to Client A’s attorney to relay the gist of the conversation.  Client A’s attorney then contacts Client A to let them know the results of the communication attempts.  Between scheduling issues, missed phone calls, email delays, etc., it can take weeks to resolve an issue that would take Client A and Client B ten minutes to fix if they discussed it themselves.  As you can imagine, it is common for litigation divorces to have lots of random issues like this come up, all of which act to slow down the process.

Additionally, any time the court becomes involved in resolving a dispute, everyone is bound to that judge’s schedule.  If the judge doesn’t have time for a hearing for two months, which is not uncommon at all depending on the judge and the jurisdiction, then everything is slowed down and delayed.

All of this is to say that litigation divorces, depending on things like the number and complexity of issues, the attorneys involved, the court’s calendar, etc., can easily take well over a year to obtain a final judgment, so it is important that you plan accordingly, both financially and mentally.

A collaborative divorce, however, tends to move much faster than a litigated divorce.  Communications tend to be more efficient as everyone works toward a common goal, even if they are not always in agreement about how to get to that goal.  The Collaborative team meetings are agenda-driven and very focused.  As such, more can be accomplished with less time.  Finally, the faster clients are in obtaining the various financial documents needed to understand the family’s picture and build options, the faster the matter can be resolved.  When all is said and done, the vast majority of collaborative divorces resolve within a year of beginning, with many resolving in under six months.  If the time it takes to divorce is your top priority, then consider a collaborative divorce.

Can a divorce settlement be reopened?

Answer:  With a few exceptions, probably not.  Most divorces resolve with a Marital Settlement Agreement (“MSA”), not a trial.  The Agreement may be reached before attorneys are involved, at or after mediation, or even the night before a trial.  But the fact is most divorces end with an MSA that the couple agrees to, often reluctantly.  A settlement agreement is supposed to provide a family with finality and understanding when it comes to the terms of their divorce.

The two most common ways an MSA is reopened is to modify either child support, or alimony, or both.  Child support is always modifiable so long as the statutory requirements are met.  Alimony is modifiable under certain circumstances, so long as the right to modify it has not been waived in the MSA.

Otherwise, short of evidence of fraud, duress, or material misrepresentation of fact, reopening an MSA is going to be highly unlikely, if not impossible.  If you are unhappy with the terms of the MSA you signed, there is not much to be done about it.  This is why it is extremely important that you a) speak to an attorney before you sign an MSA, regardless of who drafted it; b) make sure you understand the specific terms and conditions of the MSA (if you have questions, the time to ask is before you sign it and your attorney should ensure that you understand what is being explained); and c) take the time to contemplate the MSA and make sure you are comfortable enough with it to sign it (don’t rush on anyone else’s behalf—this is your life and your future).

 

Divorces are full of nuances and complicated decisions.  This is why it is important that you speak to an attorney who will help you understand the law and your options, not someone who will simply quote a statute at you and expect you to fully understand something attorneys go to law school to be able to grasp.  At Artemis Family Law Group, we pride ourselves on making the law as accessible to clients as possible.  If you don’t understand something, then our job is not finished.  Please click here to schedule a consultation at your convenience.

Tips to Prepare Financially For Your Divorce

a bunch of 100 dollar bills

If you find yourself at a crossroads, contemplating divorce, you’re likely aware of the emotional and personal toll it can take. But have you considered the financial aspects? Preparing for a divorce is not just about untangling your emotions; it’s also about safeguarding your financial well-being and future. Here, we’ll guide you through the essential steps to prepare for divorce financially, and also highlight some critical pitfalls to avoid.

 

  1. Understand Your Current Financial Situation

The first step in preparing for divorce is to have a clear picture of your current financial situation. Gather all your financial documents, including bank statements, tax returns, pay stubs, and information about assets and debts. This is the foundation upon which you’ll build your financial strategy.  Depending on how organized you are, this can take a while, so make sure you allow yourself an adequate amount of time and try not to get too frustrated at how arduous it can feel.  The only way to figure out what you are entitled to is to determine what you have (and what you owe) in the first place.  The sooner you begin this organizational process, the better it will be for your divorce process (it will cost less in legal fees for your attorney to sort through your finances, you will be able to start filling out your financial affidavit sooner and will have a head start completing your mandatory disclosure requirements).

 

  1. Budget for the Divorce

Divorces can be costly, and it’s essential to budget for legal fees, court costs, and other divorce-related expenses.  Consult with multiple family law attorneys to get a better understanding of what kinds of costs your case may involve. Having a budget can help you avoid financial surprises.  If you and your spouse are in a place where you can discuss these kinds of things, have a conversation about how to budget for the divorce; try to get on the same page in terms of how much you believe it will cost.  Sometimes the very act of trying to budget for a divorce together can help a separating couple stay focused on keeping the peace in the interest of staying on budget.

 

  1. Save for Post-Divorce Life

As you plan for divorce, start setting aside money for your post-divorce life. Create an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses, and consider opening a separate bank account if you don’t already have one.  It is important to remember, however, that everything a couple earns while married is presumed to be marital, including emergency funds and separate savings accounts.  These will likely be subject to equitable distribution, but starting with some cash on hand to use for post-divorce life, even if it’s been split in some manner, will provide you a soft landing in the post-divorce landscape.

 

  1. Inventory Your Assets and Debts

Make a comprehensive list of your marital assets and debts. Include everything from real estate and vehicles to investments and credit card balances. Knowing what you own and owe is crucial for equitable asset division.  There are plenty of assets that are commonly forgotten in this process, so check here for a list of items to make sure you remember when creating your inventory of assets and liabilities.  Again, this will help you in your divorce process overall as well.

 

  1. Consider Your Post-Divorce Budget

Think about what your financial situation will look like after the divorce. This includes housing costs, child support or spousal support (if applicable), and your daily expenses. Creating a post-divorce budget will help you make informed financial decisions.  It will also help you understand what your needs may be in terms of spousal support, and it will also help clarify what your housing options could be.  Post-divorce financial uncertainty seems to be the thing that causes the most anxiety during a divorce, so the sooner you can start to get a realistic idea of what your financial future could look like, the more relaxed you will feel during and after the process.

 

  1. Avoid Financial Mistakes

When preparing for divorce, avoid certain financial mistakes that can have long-lasting consequences. These include:

Hiding Assets: Concealing assets is unlawful and can lead to severe consequences in court. Be transparent about your financial situation.  Also, from a practical standpoint, it is not particularly difficult to figure out that someone is hiding assets, so don’t waste everyone’s time trying.

Gifting or Transferring Assets: Trying to give away assets or income to friends or family to protect them from division can backfire during the divorce process.  And again, this is easy to figure out and there will be unfortunate consequences for the one trying to do this.

Becoming Unemployed or Underemployed: Intentionally quitting your job or reducing your income can affect spousal and child support calculations negatively. Maintain your employment to ensure a fair outcome.  There are ways to figure out that someone has intentionally become unemployed or underemployed and the court will remedy this by imputing income to the person who is trying to artificially reduce their income.

 

  1. Consult a Financial Advisor

Consider seeking advice from a financial advisor who specializes in divorce planning.  They can help you understand the financial implications and assist in making informed decisions.  It is important to make sure that they are qualified in their role and that they will not improperly influence you during the divorce proceedings.  A good financial advisor can be invaluable both during and after the divorce process.  They can also assist you with budgeting for your future as well.

 

  1. Protect Your Credit

It’s crucial to safeguard your credit during a divorce.  Monitor your credit report to ensure that your ex-spouse’s financial actions don’t negatively impact your credit score.  Talk to a lawyer or financial advisor if you are concerned that certain actions taken by you or your spouse could negatively impact your credit score.

 

  1. Update Your Estate Plan

Review and update your estate plan, including your will, beneficiary designations, and power of attorney. Ensure your wishes reflect your post-divorce situation.

 

  1. Consider Collaborative Divorce Options

If possible, consider the collaborative divorce process, which focuses on cooperation and amicable settlement. This can often be a more cost-effective and less adversarial option.

 

In conclusion, preparing for divorce, especially from a financial perspective, is a critical step in ensuring your future stability. Understanding your financial situation, budgeting, and avoiding common financial pitfalls are essential components of this process. Remember, it’s essential to seek professional guidance, whether from a family law attorney or a financial advisor, to navigate the complexities of divorce and make informed decisions. By taking these steps, you can secure your financial future as you move forward in your post-divorce life.  When you are ready to speak to an attorney about your options, please click here to schedule a consultation with our office.

Keeping Your Divorce Costs in Check: Practical Tips for a Cost-Effective Divorce

a person calculating a budget

Divorce can be emotionally challenging, and it can also take a toll on your finances. To help you navigate this difficult time while keeping costs down, we’ve compiled a comprehensive list of practical suggestions that can make a significant difference in the overall expense of your divorce.

Effective Communication with Your Attorney

Effective communication with your attorney is the cornerstone of a cost-effective divorce. Here’s a more detailed look at this essential aspect:

Set a Regular Update Schedule: Instead of reaching out to your attorney every time a thought pops into your head, establish a regular communication schedule. Weekly updates, combined with your questions, encourage you to consolidate your thoughts, which can streamline your attorney’s responses and minimize billable hours.

Use Clear and Concise Language: When communicating with your attorney, use clear and concise language to convey your thoughts and concerns. This clarity can prevent misunderstandings, reducing the need for additional discussions and expenses.

Timely Information Gathering

The efficient gathering of information can significantly impact your divorce costs. Here’s how you can be more proactive in this regard:

Respond Promptly to Requests: Whenever your attorney requests specific information, responding promptly is vital. Providing all necessary documents and details in one comprehensive response reduces the need for multiple follow-ups, saving both time and money.

Organize Your Documents: Maintain a well-organized file of all relevant documents. Categorize them by type, date, and relevance, making it easier for both you and your attorney to access crucial information quickly.

Consult Your Attorney While Negotiating with Your Spouse

Frankly, it is a lot better for your finances if you and your spouse can resolve some of your issues without attorney involvement.  Think about it:  If every issue, no matter how minute, had to be run through attorneys in order to be resolved, the amount of billable time in your matter will skyrocket.  Before engaging in negotiations with your spouse, however, it’s wise to consult your attorney.  Here’s why this step is crucial:

Legal Guidance: Your attorney offers invaluable guidance, ensuring that your negotiations align with your best interests. They can also help you navigate complex legal matters, potentially saving you from costly mistakes that can arise from uninformed decisions.

Ask Questions When in Doubt: If you’re unsure about any aspect of the negotiations or the legal process, don’t hesitate to ask your attorney. Clarifications can prevent costly misunderstandings or errors.  Your attorney should be glad to explain anything to you and should make legal concepts as accessible and understandable as possible for you.

Review Attorney Communications Carefully

Attorneys often send important communications, and it’s crucial to pay close attention to them:

Proactive Approach: Many questions you may have can be addressed within the communications sent by your attorney’s office. Reading them carefully and seeking clarification only when necessary can save you from incurring additional billable hours. It’s a proactive approach to staying informed.

Keep an Organized Record: Maintain a record of all communications with your attorney. This record ensures that you can easily reference past discussions, minimizing the need to revisit the same topics.

Avoid Aggressive Attorneys

Selecting the right attorney is pivotal in keeping costs down. Here’s why you should avoid overly aggressive attorneys:

Billable Hour Model: Some attorneys have a business model that relies on fostering aggression and prolonging the divorce process to bill more hours. Opt for an attorney who prioritizes resolution and cooperation, as this can lead to a more cost-effective and efficient divorce.  If both you and your spouse retain attorneys who are resolution minded and not out to fan the flames, you have a much better chance of keeping your legal costs down compared to a lengthy legal battle.

Additional Tips for a Cost-Effective Divorce

Open and Honest Communication: Fostering open and honest communication with your spouse can facilitate smoother negotiations. A willingness to discuss matters openly can lead to more amicable and cost-effective solutions.

Create a Detailed Budget: Planning your finances carefully during the divorce process is essential. Consider all expenses, including legal fees and post-divorce costs, to avoid financial surprises that can inflate the overall cost.

Seek Expert Advice: Consult financial experts when necessary. Their expertise can help you make well-informed decisions about property division, alimony, and other financial matters.

Stay Organized: Keeping all your divorce-related documents and correspondence organized is a practical way to save time and money in legal fees. A well-organized approach ensures that nothing is overlooked and helps maintain clarity throughout the process.

Stay Informed: Familiarize yourself with your state’s divorce laws and regulations. Understanding the legal framework can help you make informed decisions and minimize costly legal disputes.

Consider Alternative Dispute Resolution: Explore alternative dispute resolution methods like mediation or collaborative divorce, which can lead to cost savings by avoiding contentious court battles.

In conclusion, navigating a divorce is never easy, but these practical tips and additional suggestions can help you keep costs in check while ensuring a smoother process. By following these recommendations and choosing an attorney who aligns with your goals, you can make the journey to resolution less financially burdensome.  At Artemis Family Law Group, we are ready to help you navigate your divorce in a cost-effective manner, so please schedule a consultation today.

Does Adultery Matter in My Divorce?

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Many marriages end due to the adultery of one spouse (or both spouses).  But does that adultery matter in the divorce?  Legally speaking, probably not.

Florida is a “no-fault divorce” state, which means that any individual who is in a marriage can obtain a divorce either because the marriage is “irretrievably broken” or due to the mental incapacity of one of the spouses, so long as the spouse alleged to be incompetent has been adjudicated as such at least three years prior to the divorce.  Section 61.052(1)(a)-(b), Florida Statutes (2023).  You’ll notice that there is no mention of a finding of fault against either spouse in order to obtain a divorce in Florida.

Many decades ago, before Florida adopted the “no-fault divorce” statute, a spouse did have to prove entitlement to divorce, and one of the primary ways to meet that burden was to prove that the other spouse had committed adultery.  Those days are long gone.  However, there is one exception in which the adultery of one spouse can have an impact on a divorce:  alimony.

The latest version of Florida alimony statute states, “The court may consider the adultery of either spouse and any resulting economic impact in determining the amount of alimony, if any, to be awarded.”  Section 61.08(1)(a), Florida Statutes (2023).  It is not simply the existence of an adulterous affair or adulterous conduct that matters, however.  There is a long line of cases discussing what is called the dissipation of marital assets.  Essentially, if adulterous conduct led a spouse to secretly waste marital assets on an adulterous relationship, that decrease in overall marital assets can be considered when determining the amount of alimony.  Adulterous affairs can lead to all kinds of very expensive spending, such as on jewelry, vacations, paying for someone’s living situation, expensive meals, etc.  An ongoing adulterous affair that goes on long enough can result in significant dissipation of marital assets.

Proving dissipation can be a difficult and costly endeavor, as you must do more than simply allege that your marital assets were reduced due to a spouse’s affair.  Typically, one must go through years of bank statements and financial records to piece together which purchases were for the benefit of the marriage and which ones were for the benefit of the adulterous relationship.  Thus, like much of the family law system, a cost-benefit analysis must be performed to determine how worthwhile this undertaking would be compared to how costly it would be.  If financial experts are required, then the cost can really skyrocket.

We understand that divorce is an emotional process as well as a financial process, and often it can be difficult to see the cost-benefit analysis and make the right decision for yourself.  This is why it is extremely important to speak to an attorney who will not simply agitate you and push you to go down this road, which will increase the number of hours they spend on your divorce significantly, and speak to someone who will provide you a level-headed analysis based on a multitude of factors (your family’s financial capabilities generally, your odds of success given the county you are in and the judge presiding over your divorce, how much more you are likely to receive if you are successful, and how much it will reasonably cost to investigate and pursue an alimony award based in part on suspected dissipation of marital assets).  Please click here to schedule a consultation at your convenience and discuss your options with an attorney you can trust to help you make the right decisions for you and your family.

Family Law Rule Update: Better Financial Privacy in Divorce

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What is the rule 12.285 in Florida?

On September 7, 2023, the Florida Supreme Court announced amendments to Florida Family Law Rule of Procedure 12.285 related to mandatory financial disclosure requirements.  Under previous versions of the rule, parties were required to file and serve their financial affidavits, with the only exception being simplified dissolutions of marriage with no minor children and no support issues, which are rare.

Under the new Rule 12.285, the parties may agree to forego filing their financial affidavits with the court.  Instead, the parties must file a joint verified waiver of filing financial affidavits.  According to the new rule, in the joint verified waiver the parties must acknowledge the following:

A.  that evidence of their current or past financial circumstances may be necessary for future court proceedings;

B.  they each have provided the other with a fully executed and sworn financial affidavit in conformity with Florida Family Law Form 12.902(b) or 12.902(c), as applicable;

C.  that the responsibility to retain copies of all affidavits exchanged rests solely with the parties;

D.  that the waiver only applies to the current filing and does not automatically apply to any future filings; and

E.  that the waiver may be revoked by either party at any time.

Rule 12.285(c)(2), Florida Family Law Rules of Procedure.

Thus, according to the new rule, the parties must still provide each other with completed and sworn financial affidavits, but they are not necessarily required to file them.  They must also ensure that they have properly retained copies of the exchanged affidavits among themselves as the court will not have copies to maintain.  While the new rule was announced on September 7, 2023, it does not become effective until November 1, 2023.

Do I have to fill out a financial affidavit in Florida?

Since the revisions to Rule 12.285, discussed above, which permitted parties to waive the requirement of filing financial affidavits, the Florida Supreme Court has created a new form to address a shortcoming in the new rule.  Financial affidavits are used to determine parties’ incomes in order to calculate child support.  Without financial affidavits filed, the court does not have a basis to ensure child support is being calculated correctly.  To remedy this problem, the Florida Supreme Court created a new form, the Affidavit of Income for Child Support.  This form is limited to just the financial information needed to calculate child support and is therefore less invasive than the standard financial affidavit, which encompasses every aspect of a person’s financial life.  As a part of these revisions, the Florida Supreme Court also implemented a standard form for the Notice of Joint Verified Waiver of Filing Financial Affidavits, which the Court had previously declined to adopt.

Thus, there is now a standard form for the Notice of Joint Verified Waiver of Filing Financial Affidavit and for the new Affidavit of Income for Child Support to guide parties through this process.

Limited Application of New Rule 12.285

While the new 12.285 could apply to any case, realistically speaking if your matter is contested and the judge is having to decide financial matters, whether temporary support during your divorce, or resolving financial issues like alimony, child support, etc. at a trial, both parties will have to file financial affidavits so the court can review and weigh that evidence.  It is also going to be vital to ensure that the financial affidavits are part of the trial court’s record if the matter ends up before the appellate court.  Failure to include financial affidavits in the record on appeal could very well result in an unsuccessful appeal due to an incomplete record.

So, in what circumstances will the new 12.285 apply?  Collaborative divorces are a primary candidate for 12.285’s financial affidavit filing waiver.  Additionally, uncontested divorces are also likely to take advantage of the new rule, as they don’t require court intervention to reach a resolution.  Another scenario that could apply is contested divorces that are able to reach a resolution at mediation or at any point before court intervention is required.  Importantly, however, the parties would have to agree to simply exchange completed and sworn financial affidavits during the mandatory disclosure process and wait to see if filing them becomes necessary.

Why Does This Matter?

Financial affidavits are incredibly detailed documents, containing every facet of a family’s financial standing, including incomes, all debts, monthly payments to creditors, monthly bills, and all assets such as real property, investment and retirement accounts, and jewelry, to name just some of the required items.  Filing a financial affidavit makes it part of the public record, accessible to anyone who would seek to view it.  Many individuals value their privacy and would prefer not to have that much of their financial life placed into the view of the public.  The new Rule 12.285 provides a way to avoid so much public financial exposure.

If you have any questions about how best to maintain your financial privacy in a divorce, please click here to schedule a consultation from the convenience of your computer or mobile device.

Parallel Parenting: When Co-Parenting Won’t Work

a parent and child holding hands with the sun behind them

Co-parenting during and after a divorce isn’t easy, even under the best of circumstances.  It asks a lot of both parents:  to set aside or ignore their feelings toward their ex-spouse, to put on a happy face during exchanges when they are emotionally distraught, and to restrain themselves when potentially triggering comments are made by their ex-spouse.  Many divorces are based, in part, on communication issues between spouses, so there is no reason to think those communication issues will simply vanish when it comes to co-parenting.  Fortunately, something called “parallel parenting” offers another option, in particular in high-conflict situations.

What is Parallel Parenting?

Parallel Parenting is a type of parenting in which both parents severely limit their communications and contact with each other.  Often they agree to one specific form of communication, usually written, such as text messages, email, or use of a third-party parenting app.  Instead of parents speaking regularly to each other about their children, they limit their communication to only that which is necessary, and usually only when an exchange has occurred or is occurring.  For example one spouse may text the other that a child has a cold before dropping him off with the other parent.  Otherwise, communications are limited to only what is strictly necessary.  “Just the facts, ma’am.”  No one is asking about each other’s weekends or how the new job is going.

In more high-conflict parallel parenting arrangements, the children are exchanged in “neutral” third-party locations, such as a parking lot, instead of at either spouse’s residence, which can trigger conflict.

While the ideal arrangement is healthy co-parenting in which both parents are able to communicate robustly about and around their children, this is simply not a realistic option for many parents.  In those situations, it is in the best interests of the children that they be sheltered from parenting conflicts, even if it means setting up strict communication boundaries between parents.

Parallel Parenting Doesn’t Need to be Permanent

Just because a rigid Parallel Parenting arrangement is necessary during a divorce, or immediately upon conclusion of a divorce, does not mean that it will be necessary forever.  Often Parallel Parenting offers parents the opportunity to get comfortable with their new lives, their new independence, and their new roles as single parents.  This can provide the hostility and negative emotions between parents the opportunity to dissipate.  Once things have “cooled down” between the parents–after a few months, or a few years–they can allow their Parallel Parenting arrangement to evolve into a more traditional co-parenting relationship, with stronger communication and integration between the parents.  Text messages only become phone calls and FaceTimes as well; exchanges at the mall parking lot start to occur at the parents’ residences; parents start to share details about the children’s time with them with the other parent.  Sometimes getting to a point like this requires distance and strong boundaries at first to get there.

Parallel Parenting Isn’t Just for High-Conflict Divorces

When you receive your Final Judgment of Dissolution of Marriage, you will be legally divorced, and you will be financially divorced.  However, in many cases you will not be close to emotionally divorced yet.  Couples often focus so much on the details of the divorce itself while it is happening that they do not take the time to process the emotional cost of being divorced officially.  Even if you are on decent terms with your former spouse, coming out of a divorce can be a difficult time, one in which boundaries and limited overlap between the parents may provide both parents the opportunity to “move on,” which they were unable to do while in the midst of a divorce.  A less rigid form of Parallel Parenting can aid couples who need the time and distance to process their divorce before establishing a new co-parenting relationship in the future.  Opting for a short- or medium-term Parallel Parenting arrangement can often be the best way for families to move into healthy long-term dynamics.

Figuring out the best parenting arrangement for your family can be one of the most difficult decisions you make during a divorce, but it is also often the most important.  Each family is unique and as such no one-size-fits-all Parenting Plan will work for every family.  When you are ready to explore your options and discuss parenting further, click here to schedule a consultation.

Don’t Forget These Things in Your Divorce Settlement Agreement!

an empty checklist

If you resolve your divorce amicably, either through an uncontested divorce process, mediation, or a collaborative divorce, you will end up signing a Marital Settlement Agreement.  The purpose of this document is to list out all of the terms of your divorce, including which of you will receive which assets and which debts, or some specific portion of various assets and debts (in other words, memorializing the terms of your equitable distribution).  It is very important that your Settlement Agreement be as exhaustive as possible and include every asset of some significance.

Most couples can work out personal property (furniture, clothes, appliances, etc.) without needing to clutter up a Settlement Agreement with such minute details. However, failure to include important assets can lead to confusion in the future over who it belongs to after the divorce is finalized.  Here is a list of assets we have found are commonly overlooked when divorcing:

  • Cryptocurrency. This has become a major source of investment for many people.  As such, it should be treated like any other marital asset and distributed according to the couple’s wishes.  All cryptocurrency accounts and amounts should be disclosed the same as bank accounts and investment accounts.  You should consult with a financial specialist if you are unclear on the monetary worth of cryptocurrencies as some can have a very significant value.
  • Jewelry. If you have jewelry you believe to be of significant value (which is for each couple to decide for themselves), then there is a good chance it should be included in the Settlement Agreement.  If the jewelry is of such a value, occasionally an appraisal will need to be performed to determine its total overall value.  But remember, wedding rings and engagement rings are not considered marital assets and are not subject to equitable distribution.
  • Hotel or Vacation Points. These can be quite easy to forget about when you are navigating a divorce.  But they can have value, and if nothing else it should be clear who is going to keep them and whether and how a transfer will be necessary to make that happen.
  • Future tax refunds for the prior year. If you are anticipating receiving a tax refund during or after the divorce, for a year in which you filed as married and are both entitled to a refund, you should ensure that is addressed in clear terms in your Settlement Agreement.  Some tax refunds are for substantial amounts and should not be overlooked.  The same goes true for tax liabilities as well.
  • Frequent Flyer Miles. Similar to hotel and vacation points, frequent flyer miles are easy to miss but can provide plenty of value.  Check to see whether and how frequent flyer miles can be transferred from one spouse to another if that is part of the Settlement Agreement.
  • Paid Time Off/Sick Leave Time. Florida law provides that accrued vacation and/or sick time which is unused at the time of divorce is a marital asset and subject to equitable distribution.  Not all vacation and sick time is created equal, however.  The employee must be eligible to be compensated for unused hours upon termination of employment.  This includes military vacation and sick time as well.  The non-employee spouse cannot choose to exercise the vacation or sick time on behalf of the employee spouse, so the total value of the benefit should be determined so the employee spouse can “buy out” the non-employee spouse for their share of the leave time’s value.
  • Cemetery Plots. Many spouses make arrangements to be buried next to each other.  This can be an expensive arrangement and should thus be addressed in the Settlement Agreement.  Otherwise, if there is lack of clarity after someone has passed away, it can lead to a host of complications.  Further, if one former spouse re-marries and wants to use the burial plot for their new spouse, if the agreement is silent as to who has claim to the burial plots, it is entirely possible that neither former spouse will be able to use the burial plots with a new spouse.

Equitable Distribution can be a daunting and complicated process, particularly for longer marriages which have had more time to accrue more marital assets.  This is why it is important to have an attorney review your equitable distribution, even if you don’t need legal advice on how to split things up.  Ensuring that you get your Marital Settlement Agreement done correctly and completely the first time can avoid uncertainty and potential legal intervention in the future.  We at Artemis Family Law Group are ready to discuss your thoughts about equitable distribution and the status of your Settlement Agreement.  Please click here to schedule a consultation at your convenience.