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Paul Shafranski

Paul, from Florida, studied at the University of Florida and believes in a kinder approach to family law. He teamed up with Teris Deitsch, who's been helping families in legal matters since 2006. Both feel strongly about finding peaceful solutions rather than fighting in court. In 2018, they started Artemis Family Law Group together. They're all about helping families in a friendly, understanding way.

Tips to Prepare Financially For Your Divorce

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If you find yourself at a crossroads, contemplating divorce, you’re likely aware of the emotional and personal toll it can take. But have you considered the financial aspects? Preparing for a divorce is not just about untangling your emotions; it’s also about safeguarding your financial well-being and future. Here, we’ll guide you through the essential steps to prepare for divorce financially, and also highlight some critical pitfalls to avoid.

 

  1. Understand Your Current Financial Situation

The first step in preparing for divorce is to have a clear picture of your current financial situation. Gather all your financial documents, including bank statements, tax returns, pay stubs, and information about assets and debts. This is the foundation upon which you’ll build your financial strategy.  Depending on how organized you are, this can take a while, so make sure you allow yourself an adequate amount of time and try not to get too frustrated at how arduous it can feel.  The only way to figure out what you are entitled to is to determine what you have (and what you owe) in the first place.  The sooner you begin this organizational process, the better it will be for your divorce process (it will cost less in legal fees for your attorney to sort through your finances, you will be able to start filling out your financial affidavit sooner and will have a head start completing your mandatory disclosure requirements).

 

  1. Budget for the Divorce

Divorces can be costly, and it’s essential to budget for legal fees, court costs, and other divorce-related expenses.  Consult with multiple family law attorneys to get a better understanding of what kinds of costs your case may involve. Having a budget can help you avoid financial surprises.  If you and your spouse are in a place where you can discuss these kinds of things, have a conversation about how to budget for the divorce; try to get on the same page in terms of how much you believe it will cost.  Sometimes the very act of trying to budget for a divorce together can help a separating couple stay focused on keeping the peace in the interest of staying on budget.

 

  1. Save for Post-Divorce Life

As you plan for divorce, start setting aside money for your post-divorce life. Create an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses, and consider opening a separate bank account if you don’t already have one.  It is important to remember, however, that everything a couple earns while married is presumed to be marital, including emergency funds and separate savings accounts.  These will likely be subject to equitable distribution, but starting with some cash on hand to use for post-divorce life, even if it’s been split in some manner, will provide you a soft landing in the post-divorce landscape.

 

  1. Inventory Your Assets and Debts

Make a comprehensive list of your marital assets and debts. Include everything from real estate and vehicles to investments and credit card balances. Knowing what you own and owe is crucial for equitable asset division.  There are plenty of assets that are commonly forgotten in this process, so check here for a list of items to make sure you remember when creating your inventory of assets and liabilities.  Again, this will help you in your divorce process overall as well.

 

  1. Consider Your Post-Divorce Budget

Think about what your financial situation will look like after the divorce. This includes housing costs, child support or spousal support (if applicable), and your daily expenses. Creating a post-divorce budget will help you make informed financial decisions.  It will also help you understand what your needs may be in terms of spousal support, and it will also help clarify what your housing options could be.  Post-divorce financial uncertainty seems to be the thing that causes the most anxiety during a divorce, so the sooner you can start to get a realistic idea of what your financial future could look like, the more relaxed you will feel during and after the process.

 

  1. Avoid Financial Mistakes

When preparing for divorce, avoid certain financial mistakes that can have long-lasting consequences. These include:

Hiding Assets: Concealing assets is unlawful and can lead to severe consequences in court. Be transparent about your financial situation.  Also, from a practical standpoint, it is not particularly difficult to figure out that someone is hiding assets, so don’t waste everyone’s time trying.

Gifting or Transferring Assets: Trying to give away assets or income to friends or family to protect them from division can backfire during the divorce process.  And again, this is easy to figure out and there will be unfortunate consequences for the one trying to do this.

Becoming Unemployed or Underemployed: Intentionally quitting your job or reducing your income can affect spousal and child support calculations negatively. Maintain your employment to ensure a fair outcome.  There are ways to figure out that someone has intentionally become unemployed or underemployed and the court will remedy this by imputing income to the person who is trying to artificially reduce their income.

 

  1. Consult a Financial Advisor

Consider seeking advice from a financial advisor who specializes in divorce planning.  They can help you understand the financial implications and assist in making informed decisions.  It is important to make sure that they are qualified in their role and that they will not improperly influence you during the divorce proceedings.  A good financial advisor can be invaluable both during and after the divorce process.  They can also assist you with budgeting for your future as well.

 

  1. Protect Your Credit

It’s crucial to safeguard your credit during a divorce.  Monitor your credit report to ensure that your ex-spouse’s financial actions don’t negatively impact your credit score.  Talk to a lawyer or financial advisor if you are concerned that certain actions taken by you or your spouse could negatively impact your credit score.

 

  1. Update Your Estate Plan

Review and update your estate plan, including your will, beneficiary designations, and power of attorney. Ensure your wishes reflect your post-divorce situation.

 

  1. Consider Collaborative Divorce Options

If possible, consider the collaborative divorce process, which focuses on cooperation and amicable settlement. This can often be a more cost-effective and less adversarial option.

 

In conclusion, preparing for divorce, especially from a financial perspective, is a critical step in ensuring your future stability. Understanding your financial situation, budgeting, and avoiding common financial pitfalls are essential components of this process. Remember, it’s essential to seek professional guidance, whether from a family law attorney or a financial advisor, to navigate the complexities of divorce and make informed decisions. By taking these steps, you can secure your financial future as you move forward in your post-divorce life.  When you are ready to speak to an attorney about your options, please click here to schedule a consultation with our office.

Keeping Your Divorce Costs in Check: Practical Tips for a Cost-Effective Divorce

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Divorce can be emotionally challenging, and it can also take a toll on your finances. To help you navigate this difficult time while keeping costs down, we’ve compiled a comprehensive list of practical suggestions that can make a significant difference in the overall expense of your divorce.

Effective Communication with Your Attorney

Effective communication with your attorney is the cornerstone of a cost-effective divorce. Here’s a more detailed look at this essential aspect:

Set a Regular Update Schedule: Instead of reaching out to your attorney every time a thought pops into your head, establish a regular communication schedule. Weekly updates, combined with your questions, encourage you to consolidate your thoughts, which can streamline your attorney’s responses and minimize billable hours.

Use Clear and Concise Language: When communicating with your attorney, use clear and concise language to convey your thoughts and concerns. This clarity can prevent misunderstandings, reducing the need for additional discussions and expenses.

Timely Information Gathering

The efficient gathering of information can significantly impact your divorce costs. Here’s how you can be more proactive in this regard:

Respond Promptly to Requests: Whenever your attorney requests specific information, responding promptly is vital. Providing all necessary documents and details in one comprehensive response reduces the need for multiple follow-ups, saving both time and money.

Organize Your Documents: Maintain a well-organized file of all relevant documents. Categorize them by type, date, and relevance, making it easier for both you and your attorney to access crucial information quickly.

Consult Your Attorney While Negotiating with Your Spouse

Frankly, it is a lot better for your finances if you and your spouse can resolve some of your issues without attorney involvement.  Think about it:  If every issue, no matter how minute, had to be run through attorneys in order to be resolved, the amount of billable time in your matter will skyrocket.  Before engaging in negotiations with your spouse, however, it’s wise to consult your attorney.  Here’s why this step is crucial:

Legal Guidance: Your attorney offers invaluable guidance, ensuring that your negotiations align with your best interests. They can also help you navigate complex legal matters, potentially saving you from costly mistakes that can arise from uninformed decisions.

Ask Questions When in Doubt: If you’re unsure about any aspect of the negotiations or the legal process, don’t hesitate to ask your attorney. Clarifications can prevent costly misunderstandings or errors.  Your attorney should be glad to explain anything to you and should make legal concepts as accessible and understandable as possible for you.

Review Attorney Communications Carefully

Attorneys often send important communications, and it’s crucial to pay close attention to them:

Proactive Approach: Many questions you may have can be addressed within the communications sent by your attorney’s office. Reading them carefully and seeking clarification only when necessary can save you from incurring additional billable hours. It’s a proactive approach to staying informed.

Keep an Organized Record: Maintain a record of all communications with your attorney. This record ensures that you can easily reference past discussions, minimizing the need to revisit the same topics.

Avoid Aggressive Attorneys

Selecting the right attorney is pivotal in keeping costs down. Here’s why you should avoid overly aggressive attorneys:

Billable Hour Model: Some attorneys have a business model that relies on fostering aggression and prolonging the divorce process to bill more hours. Opt for an attorney who prioritizes resolution and cooperation, as this can lead to a more cost-effective and efficient divorce.  If both you and your spouse retain attorneys who are resolution minded and not out to fan the flames, you have a much better chance of keeping your legal costs down compared to a lengthy legal battle.

Additional Tips for a Cost-Effective Divorce

Open and Honest Communication: Fostering open and honest communication with your spouse can facilitate smoother negotiations. A willingness to discuss matters openly can lead to more amicable and cost-effective solutions.

Create a Detailed Budget: Planning your finances carefully during the divorce process is essential. Consider all expenses, including legal fees and post-divorce costs, to avoid financial surprises that can inflate the overall cost.

Seek Expert Advice: Consult financial experts when necessary. Their expertise can help you make well-informed decisions about property division, alimony, and other financial matters.

Stay Organized: Keeping all your divorce-related documents and correspondence organized is a practical way to save time and money in legal fees. A well-organized approach ensures that nothing is overlooked and helps maintain clarity throughout the process.

Stay Informed: Familiarize yourself with your state’s divorce laws and regulations. Understanding the legal framework can help you make informed decisions and minimize costly legal disputes.

Consider Alternative Dispute Resolution: Explore alternative dispute resolution methods like mediation or collaborative law, which can lead to cost savings by avoiding contentious court battles.

In conclusion, navigating a divorce is never easy, but these practical tips and additional suggestions can help you keep costs in check while ensuring a smoother process. By following these recommendations and choosing an attorney who aligns with your goals, you can make the journey to resolution less financially burdensome.  At Artemis Family Law Group, we are ready to help you navigate your divorce in a cost-effective manner, so please schedule a consultation today.

Does Adultery Matter in My Divorce?

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Many marriages end due to the adultery of one spouse (or both spouses).  But does that adultery matter in the divorce?  Legally speaking, probably not.

Florida is a “no-fault divorce” state, which means that any individual who is in a marriage can obtain a divorce either because the marriage is “irretrievably broken” or due to the mental incapacity of one of the spouses, so long as the spouse alleged to be incompetent has been adjudicated as such at least three years prior to the divorce.  Section 61.052(1)(a)-(b), Florida Statutes (2023).  You’ll notice that there is no mention of a finding of fault against either spouse in order to obtain a divorce in Florida.

Many decades ago, before Florida adopted the “no-fault divorce” statute, a spouse did have to prove entitlement to divorce, and one of the primary ways to meet that burden was to prove that the other spouse had committed adultery.  Those days are long gone.  However, there is one exception in which the adultery of one spouse can have an impact on a divorce:  alimony.

The latest version of Florida alimony statute states, “The court may consider the adultery of either spouse and any resulting economic impact in determining the amount of alimony, if any, to be awarded.”  Section 61.08(1)(a), Florida Statutes (2023).  It is not simply the existence of an adulterous affair or adulterous conduct that matters, however.  There is a long line of cases discussing what is called the dissipation of marital assets.  Essentially, if adulterous conduct led a spouse to secretly waste marital assets on an adulterous relationship, that decrease in overall marital assets can be considered when determining the amount of alimony.  Adulterous affairs can lead to all kinds of very expensive spending, such as on jewelry, vacations, paying for someone’s living situation, expensive meals, etc.  An ongoing adulterous affair that goes on long enough can result in significant dissipation of marital assets.

Proving dissipation can be a difficult and costly endeavor, as you must do more than simply allege that your marital assets were reduced due to a spouse’s affair.  Typically, one must go through years of bank statements and financial records to piece together which purchases were for the benefit of the marriage and which ones were for the benefit of the adulterous relationship.  Thus, like much of the family law system, a cost-benefit analysis must be performed to determine how worthwhile this undertaking would be compared to how costly it would be.  If financial experts are required, then the cost can really skyrocket.

We understand that divorce is an emotional process as well as a financial process, and often it can be difficult to see the cost-benefit analysis and make the right decision for yourself.  This is why it is extremely important to speak to an attorney who will not simply agitate you and push you to go down this road, which will increase the number of hours they spend on your divorce significantly, and speak to someone who will provide you a level-headed analysis based on a multitude of factors (your family’s financial capabilities generally, your odds of success given the county you are in and the judge presiding over your divorce, how much more you are likely to receive if you are successful, and how much it will reasonably cost to investigate and pursue an alimony award based in part on suspected dissipation of marital assets).  Please click here to schedule a consultation at your convenience and discuss your options with an attorney you can trust to help you make the right decisions for you and your family.

UPDATED: Amendments to Family Law Rule Improves Financial Privacy in Some Divorces

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New Rule 12.285

On September 7, 2023, the Florida Supreme Court announced amendments to Florida Family Law Rule of Procedure 12.285 related to mandatory financial disclosure requirements.  Under previous versions of the rule, parties were required to file and serve their financial affidavits, with the only exception being simplified dissolutions of marriage with no minor children and no support issues, which are rare.

Under the new Rule 12.285, the parties may agree to forego filing their financial affidavits with the court.  Instead, the parties must file a joint verified waiver of filing financial affidavits.   According to the new rule, in the joint verified waiver the parties must acknowledge the following:

A.  that evidence of their current or past financial circumstances may be necessary for future court proceedings;

B.  they each have provided the other with a fully executed and sworn financial affidavit in conformity with Florida Family Law Form 12.902(b) or 12.902(c), as applicable;

C.  that the responsibility to retain copies of all affidavits exchanged rests solely with the parties;

D.  that the waiver only applies to the current filing and does not automatically apply to any future filings; and

E.  that the waiver may be revoked by either party at any time.

Rule 12.285(c)(2), Florida Family Law Rules of Procedure.

Thus, according to the new rule, the parties must still provide each other with completed and sworn financial affidavits, but they are not necessarily required to file them.  They must also ensure that they have properly retained copies of the exchanged affidavits among themselves as the court will not have copies to maintain.  While the new rule was announced on September 7, 2023, it does not become effective until November 1, 2023.

Limited Application of New Rule 12.285

While the new 12.285 could apply to any case, realistically speaking if your matter is contested and the judge is having to decide financial matters, whether temporary support during your divorce, or resolving financial issues like alimony, child support, etc. at a trial, both parties will have to file financial affidavits so the court can review and weigh that evidence.  It is also going to be vital to ensure that the financial affidavits are part of the trial court’s record if the matter ends up before the appellate court.  Failure to include financial affidavits in the record on appeal could very well result in an unsuccessful appeal due to an incomplete record.

So, in what circumstances will the new 12.285 apply?  Collaborative divorces are a primary candidate for 12.285’s financial affidavit filing waiver.  Additionally, uncontested divorces are also likely to take advantage of the new rule, as they don’t require court intervention to reach a resolution.  Another scenario that could apply is contested divorces that are able to reach a resolution at mediation or at any point before court intervention is required.  Importantly, however, the parties would have to agree to simply exchange completed and sworn financial affidavits during the mandatory disclosure process and wait to see if filing them becomes necessary.

Why Does This Matter?

Financial affidavits are incredibly detailed documents, containing every facet of a family’s financial standing, including incomes, all debts, monthly payments to creditors, monthly bills, and all assets such as real property, investment and retirement accounts, and jewelry, to name just some of the required items.  Filing a financial affidavit makes it part of the public record, accessible to anyone who would seek to view it.  Many individuals value their privacy and would prefer not to have that much of their financial life placed into the view of the public.  The new Rule 12.285 provides a way to avoid so much public financial exposure.

UPDATE:  Affidavit of Income For Child Support; Standard Notice of Verified Waiver of Filing Financial Affidavits

Since the revisions to Rule 12.285, discussed above, which permitted parties to waive the requirement of filing financial affidavits, the Florida Supreme Court has created a new form to address a shortcoming in the new rule.  Financial affidavits are used to determine parties’ incomes in order to calculate child support.  Without financial affidavits filed, the court does not have a basis to ensure child support is being calculated correctly.  To remedy this problem, the Florida Supreme Court created a new form, the Affidavit of Income for Child Support.  This form is limited to just the financial information needed to calculate child support and is therefore less invasive than the standard financial affidavit, which encompasses every aspect of a person’s financial life.  As a part of these revisions, the Florida Supreme Court also implemented a standard form for the Notice of Joint Verified Waiver of Filing Financial Affidavits, which the Court had previously declined to adopt.

Thus, there is now a standard form for the Notice of Joint Verified Waiver of Filing Financial Affidavit and for the new Affidavit of Income for Child Support to guide parties through this process.

If you have any questions about how best to maintain your financial privacy in a divorce, please click here to schedule a consultation from the convenience of your computer or mobile device.

Parallel Parenting: When Co-Parenting Won’t Work

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Co-parenting during and after a divorce isn’t easy, even under the best of circumstances.  It asks a lot of both parents:  to set aside or ignore their feelings toward their ex-spouse, to put on a happy face during exchanges when they are emotionally distraught, and to restrain themselves when potentially triggering comments are made by their ex-spouse.  Many divorces are based, in part, on communication issues between spouses, so there is no reason to think those communication issues will simply vanish when it comes to co-parenting.  Fortunately, something called “parallel parenting” offers another option, in particular in high-conflict situations.

What is Parallel Parenting?

Parallel Parenting is a type of parenting in which both parents severely limit their communications and contact with each other.  Often they agree to one specific form of communication, usually written, such as text messages, email, or use of a third-party parenting app.  Instead of parents speaking regularly to each other about their children, they limit their communication to only that which is necessary, and usually only when an exchange has occurred or is occurring.  For example one spouse may text the other that a child has a cold before dropping him off with the other parent.  Otherwise, communications are limited to only what is strictly necessary.  “Just the facts, ma’am.”  No one is asking about each other’s weekends or how the new job is going.

In more high-conflict parallel parenting arrangements, the children are exchanged in “neutral” third-party locations, such as a parking lot, instead of at either spouse’s residence, which can trigger conflict.

While the ideal arrangement is healthy co-parenting in which both parents are able to communicate robustly about and around their children, this is simply not a realistic option for many parents.  In those situations, it is in the best interests of the children that they be sheltered from parenting conflicts, even if it means setting up strict communication boundaries between parents.

Parallel Parenting Doesn’t Need to be Permanent

Just because a rigid Parallel Parenting arrangement is necessary during a divorce, or immediately upon conclusion of a divorce, does not mean that it will be necessary forever.  Often Parallel Parenting offers parents the opportunity to get comfortable with their new lives, their new independence, and their new roles as single parents.  This can provide the hostility and negative emotions between parents the opportunity to dissipate.  Once things have “cooled down” between the parents–after a few months, or a few years–they can allow their Parallel Parenting arrangement to evolve into a more traditional co-parenting relationship, with stronger communication and integration between the parents.  Text messages only become phone calls and FaceTimes as well; exchanges at the mall parking lot start to occur at the parents’ residences; parents start to share details about the children’s time with them with the other parent.  Sometimes getting to a point like this requires distance and strong boundaries at first to get there.

Parallel Parenting Isn’t Just for High-Conflict Divorces

When you receive your Final Judgment of Dissolution of Marriage, you will be legally divorced, and you will be financially divorced.  However, in many cases you will not be close to emotionally divorced yet.  Couples often focus so much on the details of the divorce itself while it is happening that they do not take the time to process the emotional cost of being divorced officially.  Even if you are on decent terms with your former spouse, coming out of a divorce can be a difficult time, one in which boundaries and limited overlap between the parents may provide both parents the opportunity to “move on,” which they were unable to do while in the midst of a divorce.  A less rigid form of Parallel Parenting can aid couples who need the time and distance to process their divorce before establishing a new co-parenting relationship in the future.  Opting for a short- or medium-term Parallel Parenting arrangement can often be the best way for families to move into healthy long-term dynamics.

Figuring out the best parenting arrangement for your family can be one of the most difficult decisions you make during a divorce, but it is also often the most important.  Each family is unique and as such no one-size-fits-all Parenting Plan will work for every family.  When you are ready to explore your options and discuss parenting further, click here to schedule a consultation.

Don’t Forget These Things in Your Divorce Settlement Agreement!

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If you resolve your divorce amicably, either through an uncontested divorce process, mediation, or a collaborative divorce, you will end up signing a Marital Settlement Agreement.  The purpose of this document is to list out all of the terms of your divorce, including which of you will receive which assets and which debts, or some specific portion of various assets and debts (in other words, memorializing the terms of your equitable distribution).  It is very important that your Settlement Agreement be as exhaustive as possible and include every asset of some significance.

Most couples can work out personal property (furniture, clothes, appliances, etc.) without needing to clutter up a Settlement Agreement with such minute details. However, failure to include important assets can lead to confusion in the future over who it belongs to after the divorce is finalized.  Here is a list of assets we have found are commonly overlooked when divorcing:

  • Cryptocurrency. This has become a major source of investment for many people.  As such, it should be treated like any other marital asset and distributed according to the couple’s wishes.  All cryptocurrency accounts and amounts should be disclosed the same as bank accounts and investment accounts.  You should consult with a financial specialist if you are unclear on the monetary worth of cryptocurrencies as some can have a very significant value.
  • Jewelry. If you have jewelry you believe to be of significant value (which is for each couple to decide for themselves), then there is a good chance it should be included in the Settlement Agreement.  If the jewelry is of such a value, occasionally an appraisal will need to be performed to determine its total overall value.  But remember, wedding rings and engagement rings are not considered marital assets and are not subject to equitable distribution.
  • Hotel or Vacation Points. These can be quite easy to forget about when you are navigating a divorce.  But they can have value, and if nothing else it should be clear who is going to keep them and whether and how a transfer will be necessary to make that happen.
  • Future tax refunds for the prior year. If you are anticipating receiving a tax refund during or after the divorce, for a year in which you filed as married and are both entitled to a refund, you should ensure that is addressed in clear terms in your Settlement Agreement.  Some tax refunds are for substantial amounts and should not be overlooked.  The same goes true for tax liabilities as well.
  • Frequent Flyer Miles. Similar to hotel and vacation points, frequent flyer miles are easy to miss but can provide plenty of value.  Check to see whether and how frequent flyer miles can be transferred from one spouse to another if that is part of the Settlement Agreement.
  • Paid Time Off/Sick Leave Time. Florida law provides that accrued vacation and/or sick time which is unused at the time of divorce is a marital asset and subject to equitable distribution.  Not all vacation and sick time is created equal, however.  The employee must be eligible to be compensated for unused hours upon termination of employment.  This includes military vacation and sick time as well.  The non-employee spouse cannot choose to exercise the vacation or sick time on behalf of the employee spouse, so the total value of the benefit should be determined so the employee spouse can “buy out” the non-employee spouse for their share of the leave time’s value.
  • Cemetery Plots. Many spouses make arrangements to be buried next to each other.  This can be an expensive arrangement and should thus be addressed in the Settlement Agreement.  Otherwise, if there is lack of clarity after someone has passed away, it can lead to a host of complications.  Further, if one former spouse re-marries and wants to use the burial plot for their new spouse, if the agreement is silent as to who has claim to the burial plots, it is entirely possible that neither former spouse will be able to use the burial plots with a new spouse.

Equitable Distribution can be a daunting and complicated process, particularly for longer marriages which have had more time to accrue more marital assets.  This is why it is important to have an attorney review your equitable distribution, even if you don’t need legal advice on how to split things up.  Ensuring that you get your Marital Settlement Agreement done correctly and completely the first time can avoid uncertainty and potential legal intervention in the future.  We at Artemis Family Law Group are ready to discuss your thoughts about equitable distribution and the status of your Settlement Agreement.  Please click here to schedule a consultation at your convenience.

Case Study: One Fictional Couple’s Journey Through Traditional and Collaborative Divorce

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The world of family law can be a mysterious one to outsiders.  Even if you have been through a divorce, your knowledge and experience is limited to your unique encounter with the family law system.  However, once you’ve seen the process play out time and time again, you begin to see patterns and similarities.  Below is a fictional example of how one couple, “John” and “Betty,” navigate the family law system through the traditional litigation method and the collaborative divorce method.  While this is by no means a representation of how every divorce unfolds, either traditionally or collaboratively, it is emblematic of the key differences between the two methods and showcases how the collaborative method can de-escalate problems while traditional litigation can often make matters worse.

Events Traditional Litigation Divorce Collaborative Divorce
Initial Filing John and Betty’s marriage had reached a breaking point, and they decided to end their relationship. However, they took separate paths in their divorce approach. John hired an aggressive attorney focused on winning the case, while Betty chose a lawyer who believed in a collaborative approach to conflict resolution. This difference in approach set the tone for the entire divorce process, leading to an adversarial environment from the start. Despite their many differences, John and Betty recognized the importance of resolving their issues amicably, especially for the sake of their children. They jointly decided to pursue a collaborative divorce, where they committed to working together respectfully and openly, seeking solutions that benefit both of them. This joint decision fostered an atmosphere of cooperation and respect throughout the process.
Temporary Time-Sharing (Custody) As John and Betty couldn’t agree on temporary time-sharing arrangements during the divorce process, the court had to step in to determine a schedule. This resulted in multiple court hearings, escalating tensions, and emotional strain on both parents and the children. The prolonged legal battle took a significant toll on the family, affecting the children’s well-being and causing financial stress due to increased legal fees. Opting for a collaborative approach, John and Betty engaged in a series of meetings with their collaborative attorneys and a child specialist. These discussions allowed them to understand the children’s needs better and craft a temporary time-sharing arrangement that considered their schedules, preferences, and emotional needs. By avoiding court intervention, they reduced stress on the children and preserved their sense of stability during the divorce.  This issue also resolved much faster than waiting on a court to have hearing availability and to issue a ruling.
Division of Assets During the traditional litigation divorce, John and Betty’s lawyers engaged in aggressive negotiations over asset division. Each party aimed to secure the most favorable outcome, leading to bitterness and hostility. The lack of open communication and trust resulted in a prolonged discovery process, with both sides refusing to share critical financial information willingly. In contrast, the collaborative divorce process embraced transparency. John and Betty, along with their joint financial specialist, shared their financial information openly and honestly. This allowed both parties to gain a comprehensive understanding of the family’s financial situation and work together to divide assets fairly.
Time-Sharing (Custody) In the traditional litigation divorce, disagreements over time-sharing (custody) were at the center of the conflict. John and Betty viewed their children’s future living arrangements differently, leading to contentious court battles. The children, caught in the middle, suffered emotionally from the constant tension and uncertainty. By choosing collaborative, John and Betty focused on the best interests of their children. They participated in joint sessions with a child specialist, who helped them understand the impact of divorce on their children’s lives. This deeper understanding allowed John and Betty to develop a comprehensive parenting plan that addressed the children’s emotional, academic, and social needs. The collaborative approach emphasized co-parenting, promoting a healthier and more stable environment for the children during and after the divorce.
Spousal Support The contentious nature of the traditional litigation divorce extended to spousal support. John and Betty disagreed on the amount and duration of support, leading to mediation failures. As a result, the court had to intervene and impose a spousal support decision, leaving both parties dissatisfied with the outcome. In the collaborative model, John and Betty engaged in a series of discussions facilitated by their attorneys and financial specialist. They openly discussed their financial circumstances, future financial goals, and individual needs. Through empathy and compromise, they reached a fair spousal support agreement that considered their respective abilities to support themselves post-divorce. The collaborative negotiations allowed both John and Betty to feel heard and respected, leading to a mutually agreeable arrangement.
Communication Issues In the traditional litigation divorce, the lack of communication between John’s attorney and Betty’s attorney often led to misunderstandings. This communication breakdown resulted in unnecessary conflicts and fueled distrust between the parties. The attorneys became a barrier to communication, heightening emotions and preventing any meaningful resolution. Recognizing the significance of effective communication, the collaborative attorneys encouraged direct communication between John and Betty. Through joint meetings and regular check-ins, John and Betty were able to express their concerns, share their perspectives, and find common ground. The collaborative attorneys acted as facilitators, ensuring that the conversations remained constructive and respectful. This improved communication helped build trust and cooperation between John and Betty, setting a positive tone for the entire process.
Discovery Process The formal discovery process in the traditional litigation divorce required an overwhelming exchange of documents, contributing to a contentious atmosphere. John and Betty’s attorneys engaged in extensive requests for information and documentation, leading to increased legal fees and delaying the resolution of the divorce. In the collaborative model, the financial specialist played a vital role in the exchange of information. The specialist guided John and Betty through the process of gathering relevant financial documents efficiently. By focusing on the necessary information and employing open communication, the collaborative process streamlined the discovery phase, saving time and reducing costs. This allowed John and Betty to concentrate on resolving their issues rather than getting bogged down in extensive paperwork.
Court Delays The traditional litigation divorce faced delays due to court backlogs and scheduling conflicts, further prolonging the emotional strain on John and Betty. The uncertainty caused by these delays intensified their anxieties, making it challenging for them to move forward. By choosing a collaborative approach, John and Betty were able to control the timeline of their divorce. They held meetings and discussions on their terms, without waiting for court dates. This efficient resolution allowed them to process their emotions and begin their post-divorce lives sooner. The reduced waiting time contributed to a smoother transition for everyone involved.
 Trial In the traditional litigation divorce, the trial turned into a battle of accusations, as each party tried to paint the other in a negative light. The children were caught in the crossfire, witnessing their parents’ hostility and experiencing emotional turmoil. In the collaborative approach, John and Betty avoided a contentious trial. Instead, they worked together with the child specialist to ensure the children’s well-being remained the top priority. The specialist provided guidance on how to communicate effectively with the children about the divorce, minimizing the emotional impact. This cooperative approach allowed the children to feel supported and loved, even as their parents went through the divorce process.
Final Resolution The traditional litigation divorce ended with a final divorce decree handed down by the judge, a stranger to the family. The contentious and emotionally draining process left John and Betty with long-lasting resentment towards each other, making it challenging for them to co-parent effectively.  Both spent enormous sums of money to litigate their divorce for well over a year, possibly years.  And even when the final judgment was handed down, both John and Betty appealed because of issues each of them had with the decisions of the judge.  The appellate process took another year to resolve and cost a hefty amount of money for both John and Betty.  And still, neither John nor Better were satisfied with the outcome. The collaborative divorce concluded with John and Betty reaching a respectful closure. They mutually agreed on all aspects of their divorce, fostering a sense of understanding and empathy for each other’s perspectives. This amicable agreement allowed them to transition into their new roles as co-parents with a foundation of respect and cooperation. The collaborative process empowered John and Betty to communicate openly and work together in the best interests of their children, facilitating a healthier post-divorce relationship.

We know this is a lot of information to process.  Your situation is unique and should be treated as such.  We welcome the opportunity to discuss your divorce options, both traditional and collaborative, so please schedule a consultation with us today.

Can I Keep My House After A Divorce? Part 2

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In Part 1 we discussed whether your house is considered marital property, various factors that influence the decision to try to keep the house after a divorce, and some of the more common options for doing so.  Now in Part 2, we will continue the conversation, in which we explore the legal process for valuing your house and some alternatives to keeping the house.

What Is My House Worth?

This is a key question if you are not going to be selling the house as a part of the divorce.  If you agree to sell the house and split the proceeds evenly, then the value of the house will simply be whatever amount for which the house is sold.  The market decides the value at the time of purchase and if you are splitting the proceeds evenly, it does not complicate equitable distribution.  In other words, if the home sells for more than expected, you and your spouse will receive the benefit of that equally and if it sells for less, you and your spouse will both bear the burden equally.

While that is the simplest route, from an equitable distribution perspective, it is very common for individuals to instead want to stay in the marital home after divorce.  That’s where it becomes important, and complicated, to ascertain the value of the home.  You have a few options, in increasing cost and complexity:

Agree to Value:

The simplest manner to determine the home’s value for equitable distribution purposes is to agree to a value.  This can be based on each of you doing your own research, online listing values (such as a Zillow estimate), or simply a strong belief you both hold as to the home’s monetary value.  After all, you know your home better than anyone else.  If you agree to a value, you can use that to determine what amount you will need to provide to your spouse, either in cash or in offsets from other marital assets, in order to buy out their share of the home so you can keep it.  The Pros of this method are the simplicity and cost-effectiveness of agreeing to a price.  The Cons of this method are the inaccuracy of the price as well as the difficulty some couples have in coming to any agreement during a divorce.

Comparative Market Analysis (CMA):

A CMA is somewhere between simply agreeing to a value and a full-blown appraisal.  A CMA is performed by a real estate agent and involves comparing similar homes in the area that have recently been sold.  Multiple factors go into a CMA, including but not limited to, location, lot size, and square footage, etc.  A CMA is a great option if you and your spouse are not too far off in your personal estimates of the home’s worth—it will help determine what number to use.  However, the bigger the difference in estimated values you and your spouse have, the less value a CMA will provide.  If the CMA comes in at or near Spouse 1’s estimated value, then Spouse 2 is likely to reject it.  If the CMA comes in at or near Spouse 2’s estimates value, then Spouse 1 is likely to reject it.  If the CMA lands somewhere in the middle of both spouse’s estimates, they both may reject it.  Ultimately, unless you both agree to be bound by the CMA, neither of you are required to agree to the price the CMA determines.  The Pros of a CMA are cost (they are usually free) and speed (they are usually performed in a matter of days).  The Cons of a CMA are that it is less accurate than an appraisal and require the parties to agree to a real estate agent to perform the CMA, which can be difficult in a high-conflict scenario.

Appraisal:

An appraisal is a more formal process than a CMA and requires a licensed appraiser to perform an appraisal.  While a lot of the market comparison process is similar to a CMA, an appraiser will typically enter your home and physically inspect the condition of the house, noting any defects, outdated aspects, or flaws with the home.  As such, an appraisal is more thorough than a CMA.  An appraisal results in an appraisal report in which the detailed findings of the home are noted, with photographic evidence.  Appraisals also take much longer to perform, typically 30-60 days, to obtain the appraisal report.  They also carry a hefty price tag.  And similarly to a CMA, either one of you may end up rejecting the appraisal report’s value of the home if it does not come close to what you already believe it to be.  Neither of you are bound by an appraisal’s value unless you both agree to be.  Often when a matter ends up in court, you end up with “dueling appraisals” with different values.  The Pros of an appraisal is the accuracy and thoroughness it provides while the Cons are the price and length of time it can take to obtain.

 

Alternatives to Keeping the House

The primary alternatives to keeping the house are selling it or letting your spouse buy you out of your share of the equity in the home.  It is often the case that the home is burdened with extensive family memories, which can make it difficult to let go of.  However, divorces are typically difficult on your finances and maintaining a home with one income instead of two can be too difficult to realistically handle.  Combined with all of the other financial and lifestyle changes that come with a divorce, sometimes it is better to say goodbye to the house and give yourself a clean break.  It is very common for there to be a “resting” or “recovery” period after a divorce in which the parties live in simpler housing for a time while they adjust to the new normal and determine what they can afford and just as importantly what they actually want at this point in their lives.

Some people move in which family for a while after a divorce, which can help stabilize their finances and provide a steady place for them and their children.  Still others move into smaller rental options, like a smaller home or an apartment, to get by during the adjustment period.  It can be helpful to start out “smaller” with your options and then adjust upward if and when you think the time is right.  Otherwise, it can be very difficult, if not impossible, to maintain the same life you had before a divorce without building back up to it.  It can also be liberating to let go of an asset that is full of so many memories that are no longer a source of comfort; we have seen clients embrace a feeling of freedom when they let go of the struggle to keep the house and figure out how to maintain it. It is certainly not an easy decision to make, but it may be the best one for you and your family overall.

 

We welcome the opportunity to discuss your housing options with you.  Please click here to schedule a consultation at your convenience.

Can I Keep My House After A Divorce? Part 1

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For most families, the home is the biggest single asset they have and the largest source of their net worth, with the possible exception of retirement accounts.  The marital home is usually fraught with emotional attachment as well.  This is why it is often the primary financial issue causing anxiety and argument during the divorce process.  The question most individuals have usually boils down to, “Can I keep the house?”  This is a simple question with some very complicated answers.

 

I.  Understanding Marital Property

The first thing to figure out is whether your home is considered martial property.  The answer is typically yes.  Simply speaking, if the home was purchased during the marriage, it is likely marital property.  Florida law defines “marital assets” as “[a]ssets acquired . . . during the marriage, individually by either spouse or jointly by them.”  Fla. Stat. 61.075(6)(a)1.a. (2023).  There are some additional complexities with the increase in the value of a nonmarital asset (a home that was purchased before getting married) during the marriage, material improvements to the home, and using marital funds to pay off part of the mortgage during the marriage, but that is for another article to discuss (stay tuned).  This article will operate under the assumption that the home in question is marital.

 

II. Factors That Influence Keeping the House

There are multiple factors that come up when thinking about whether you can and should keep the house after a divorce.

Financial situation of both spouses.  Simply put, divorce places a ton of strain on your finances.  Once you are divorced, two incomes becomes one income, and shared bills become your responsibility, not to mention that the divorce process itself can be costly.  The first thing you must ask yourself is whether you will be able to afford to keep the house after the divorce.  Will you be able to pay for the mortgage yourself?  Will you be able to keep up with the monthly household costs (insurance, utilities, maintenance, repairs, HOA fees, etc.)?  It may be helpful to consult with a financial advisor if the answers to these questions are even a little unclear to you.

Mortgage and ownership details.  The details of how your home was purchased and how it is owned will impact your whether and how you may be able to keep the house.  Are other individuals besides you and your spouse on the deed or the mortgage?  What kind or mortgage and loan do you have?

Children’s well-being.  In all divorces with children, their well-being should always be the paramount concern throughout the process.  How important is it that the children have access to the family home?  Does the home provide unique details (spacious backyard, wonderful neighbors, etc.) that help in raising your children?  Another major consideration is how important it is to stay within the children’s existing school zones.  If both parents move out of the children’s school zones, the children will likely be re-zoned and required to attend different schools.  Staying in the house is one way to ensure that school zones won’t be an issue (you can also move to another residence in the same school zone).

 

III.  Options for Keeping the House

There are a few financial options for keeping the house.

Buying out your spouse’s share.  If there is equity in the marital home, then that equity is presumed to be marital, and your spouse will likely have a claim to half of it.  You are going to have to consider whether and how you will be able to buy your spouse’s share of the equity in order to keep the house for yourself.  For example, if the house has a $200,000 mortgage and is estimated to be worth $300,000 (more on the process of determining the house’s value in Part 2), then there is approximately $100,000 in equity in the home.  Your spouse would likely be entitled to half of that equity, or $50,000.  You and your attorney would need to figure out if and how you could pay that amount to your spouse.  You can do it through a cash transaction if that is available to you, but for many families that is not an option.  Instead, you may look to other marital assets to offset the equity.  One common option is to offer your spouse an unequal portion of your retirement accounts, or to offer to let your spouse keep more than half of his or her retirement accounts.  Continuing from our example, if you have a retirement account worth $100,000, all of which is determined to be marital, then you and your spouse each would have a claim to half of that account, or $50,000.  You could offer your spouse all of this retirement account in exchange for the marital home.

Refinancing the mortgage.  This is one of the trickier aspects of keeping the marital home.  Typically, both spouses are on the mortgage.  Most lenders require refinancing in order to remove one of the mortgagors from the mortgage.  In order to refinance a loan into just your name, you will have to qualify—which typically requires things like adequate steady income, a high enough credit score, etc.  If you are denied refinancing, then chances are you will not be able to remove your spouse from the mortgage, and may at that point have to consider listing the house for sale.  If you are at all considering this option, we believe it is prudent to start the refinancing process early—even if you cannot begin signing documents, you should have conversations with your lender to see how viable a refinance would be, and then shop around if you believe you may have luck elsewhere.  It is not ideal to wait until the divorce is finalized to start looking into your refinancing options.  You should start now.

Another consideration with refinancing the mortgage is that a refinance typically triggers a new interest rate calculation by the lender.  Since interest rates have been historically low until recently, there is a chance that you will encounter a higher interest rate in refinancing.  An increase in interest rate alone can make a mortgage payment go from affordable to unaffordable.  There are options to try to circumvent this from happening, which you should speak to a qualified divorce mortgage lender to understand better.  Our office is happy to refer you to the appropriate professionals and specialists who focus on refinancing and lending during and after divorces.

 

There is so much to discuss on this issue, so please come back to read Part 2, in which we will address the legal process for valuing the house and alternatives to keeping the house.  If you have questions about any of these issues, we are eager to help you understand better.  Please contact us to schedule a consultation.

Gray Divorce: Complexities and Considerations

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In the intricate tapestry of life, relationships evolve, mature, and sometimes take unforeseen turns. This is especially true for couples who find themselves facing the complex transition known as a “gray divorce.” Gray divorce refers to the increasing trend of couples aged 50 and above choosing to end their marriages. Artemis Family Law Group understands the unique challenges that gray divorces can bring, both the issues they present and the considerations involved in navigating this sensitive journey.

Understanding Gray Divorce: Unveiling the Complexity

Gray divorce, while often echoing the emotional strains of any divorce, comes with its own set of intricacies. After decades of shared memories, assets, and intertwined lives, the decision to part ways in the later stages of life can be particularly overwhelming. Key considerations in gray divorce cases often include:

  1. Financial Complexity: Gray divorce involves unraveling shared financial ventures, retirement accounts, and properties that have accumulated over the years. Determining equitable division becomes a crucial aspect, and finding solutions that align with both parties’ financial security is essential.
  2. Retirement Realities: One of the most significant concerns in gray divorce is ensuring that both parties can maintain a secure retirement. This involves evaluating retirement accounts, pensions, and other financial instruments to ensure a stable future.
  3. Healthcare and Support: As couples age, health considerations become increasingly important. Addressing healthcare needs, including insurance coverage and potential long-term care expenses, requires careful planning to ensure both parties’ well-being.
  4. Emotional Well-being: Gray divorces can be emotionally complex, as couples reflect on the years they’ve spent together. The emotional toll of parting ways after decades can be immense, and finding ways to support each other’s emotional well-being is crucial.

The Collaborative Approach: A Considerate Path Forward

When facing the intricate landscape of a gray divorce, it’s important to consider the various approaches available to navigate this journey. While the collaborative family law model is one such approach, there are others that can also be effective. Here’s why taking a thoughtful and considerate approach is essential:

  1. Effective Communication: Regardless of the approach chosen, effective communication is key. Gray divorce cases require open dialogue and clear understanding of each individual’s needs and concerns.
  2. Tailored Solutions: Gray divorce cases often necessitate customized solutions that address the specific circumstances of each couple. Whether through collaboration, mediation, or litigation, solutions should be designed to provide stability and fairness.
  3. Emphasizing the Long-term: Gray divorce involves planning for the future, not just the immediate circumstances. Ensuring financial stability, healthcare coverage, and emotional well-being in the years to come is paramount.
  4. Professional Guidance: Seeking legal guidance from experienced family law professionals is crucial. These experts can help navigate the legal intricacies while offering empathy and support.

Empathy in Action: Navigating the Gray Divorce Journey

As legal professionals based in Central Florida, Artemis Family Law Group is committed to providing compassionate and informed guidance through the challenges of gray divorce. Our goal is to empower people with the knowledge they need to make informed decisions about the path forward, whether that’s through collaborative law, mediation, or other legal avenues.

In conclusion, gray divorce is a multifaceted journey that demands careful consideration of financial, emotional, and practical factors. At Artemis Family Law Group, we’re dedicated to supporting people in their pursuit of a brighter future, no matter which approach they choose. If you or a loved one are navigating the complexities of a gray divorce, remember that there are resources and professionals ready to guide you toward a new chapter filled with promise.

For more information on gray divorce or any family law matter, reach out to Artemis Family Law Group to explore your options.

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